Call For Me And I Will Be There (Robert Hunter & Jerry Garcia - Lazy River Road")

           For the past few months, only our 16-year-old son has been living at home.  He will remain the only child in our home through Pesach and on into the middle of May. For his sake, one of his older sisters is scheduled to return.  Yes, there are moments when he enjoys being the only child. For example, he doesn’t have to battle his sisters for bathroom rights. On the other hand, he can’t get away with pawning off his chores onto anyone else. Certainly, he cannot get away with winning the “Ignoring Game”; a game that he quickly mastered while his sisters were home. The “Ignoring Game”  is a game that all children play with their parents and sometimes their grandparents.   I remember playing it with my parents when I was a teenager.  The game can be played at any time of day and under nearly any circumstance. The rules of the game are rather simple. The parent initiates play by calling out to the teenager with a simple request. Assuming that a sibling will actually respond, the teenager ignores the first request. The parent waits approximately 30 seconds before calling out to the teenager with the same request. Again, the teenager ignores the parent’s request, hoping the other sibling will respond. Now the parent waits 45-60 seconds before calling out for the same request. This time the request is louder, sterner, and more specific. “Hello, (child’s name), yeah I am talking to you” or “can you hear me (add child’s name)? I am talking to you.” Now the game changes slightly. The teenager needs to respond, and generally, the response involves a grunt, “Huh” or a question such as “what?” or a statement such as “Ok, ok, I heard you” or “Ok, I’ll do it in a minute”.  Keep in mind, that those statements are code for “I am ignoring you doing something else that I prefer to be doing rather than anything you request.” Now the game escalates. The parent needs to get the teenager’s attention and focus on the request. To accomplish this the parent still utilizes leverage however does so in a quiet disarming manner. At this point,  I try to close the physical distance by approaching them. If they are in their room, I will stand in their doorway. With as much calm as I can muster, I turn the request into a transaction. I rely on my inner Don Corleone and try to “make an offer they can’t refuse”. I try to speak quieter and in a colder more calculating tone. First I confirm that they will ultimately fulfill the request.  Then I make a business arrangement. I remind them that they will make requests of me and ask favours of me and it will become very difficult for me to fulfill their request and favours. We agree on a reasonable timeframe for my request to be fulfilled. With mutually agreed upon deterrents to prevent potential “forgetfulness”, I thank the teenager for fulfilling my request, and the “Ignoring Game” concludes.

           This Shabbat, we begin the third book of the Torah, Sefer Vayikra by reading from the Parsha with the same name VaYikrah. For all of Bereishit (Genesis) and the first half of Shmot (Exodus), we read narratives. In the Second half of Shmot, we read the blueprints of and then the actual construction of the Mishkan – the portable worship station that would accompany Bnai Yisroel on their journey towards Eretz Yisroel. Now the Torah takes a break from narrative and construction. We begin reading the various types of offerings that Kohen Gadol, the High Priest, will make on our behalf. These offerings were the various means by which  God permitted the individual or the community to approach. We approach Hashem for a variety of reasons, including special occasions and for personal reasons: repentance, thanksgiving, and special occasions for communal reasons: seasonal festivals, or daily service.

           We are familiar with the language that usually appears when Hashem speaks to Moshe. VaYomer Adoshem el Moshe Leimor – Hashem said to Moshe saying, or VaYiDaBeR Adoshem El Moshe Leimor – And Hashem spoke to Moshe saying. Now for the first and perhaps only time, Hashem neither ‘says’ nor “speaks” to Moshe. Instead, we read   Vayikrah el Moshe -God called to Moshe (Lev 1:1). ” Imagine, God, calling out to a person before speaking? The word “VaYiKRa” ends with a letter that is in a smaller font size than the rest of the letters that are found in the Torah. So clearly, this type of VaYiKRa is different than the typical kind of VaYiKRA with all the letters being the same size. Rashi, the 11th-century French vintner and commentator, explains that God speaks in a loud booming voice; a voice that can shatter trees and be heard throughout the world. However, this VaYiKRa, was only heard by Moshe. The calling was done so in a loving manner. The diminutive final letter – Aleph; suggests two possibilities.  First, Hashem whispered Moshe’s name in a manner that only Moshe could hear. Second, Moshe was humble enough, as symbolized by the diminutive letter, that his soul was receptive to God’s calling. The result of which Moshe quickly and eagerly responded with Hinneni –“Here I am”.

      I can’t imagine Moshe ignoring God’s call. I can’t imagine Moshe saying, “I’ll be there in a minute” and not showing up. On those rare occasions when our son doesn’t feel like playing the “Ignoring Game”, but instead, immediately responds to my call; he always seems surprised that I am nicer and easier going. He even displays surprise because my request seems neither overbearing nor unreasonable. He even thinks that I am in a good mood. Usually, his immediate response elicits a smile from me or I will tell him that I “appreciate” it. I remind him that no one likes being ignored. On more than one occasion, he has sheepishly smiled and told me that it is especially hard to ignore when he is the only child in the house.

Peace,

Rav Yitz

Hearts Of Summer Held In Trust, Still Tender Young And Green (Robert Hunter & Jerry Garcia - Days Between)

My family and I were at a Bar Mitzvah last Shabbat. I was speaking to the Bar Mitzvah boy’s uncle who came in from Israel. As we spoke, and I told him that I was a Rabbi of a large synagogue that was about 4 miles from my home; his eyes grew very large and he exclaimed, “You’re him!” He proceeded to clarify himself by explaining that he had heard of this Rabbi in Toronto that walks over 4 miles each way to his shul. He then asked me what I think about when I walk. I explained that on Shabbat morning if the weather is pleasant; I will always begin my walk with the weekly Parsha. I will think about it in terms of my Shabbat morning class, the Divrei Torah that I present in two different minyanim (services). Depending on how much preparation I did during the week; that thinking, going through it in my head; may last a couple of miles or it may last the whole walk. However, if the weather is unpleasant, then at some point my thought will drift to Lottery 649, the New York State Lottery, or the Mega Millions. I will think that I should have bought a ticket. I will think about winning the lottery. I will think how I will set aside some for my children in trust funds. I will think about the various charities I wish to donate. If the lottery is large enough I will think about creating a family foundation where I can spend my days giving Tzedakah (charity).

            Parsha Behar and Parsha Bechukotai. These are the last two Parshiot of Sefer Vayikra (Book of Leviticus). Throughout the entire book, we have read how to elevate our lives with holiness. We elevate our lives by thanking God and atoning to God, through a variety of Korbonot. We elevate our lives by avoiding behavior that defiles us; we don’t marry our sisters. We elevate our lives in everyday physical behaviors; we only eat certain types of food. We elevate our lives by consciously setting aside holy times throughout the day, week, and season. In Parsha Behar, we elevate our lives and our land with holiness by setting aside another type of sacred time, Shmita (the seventh year.) Just like the seventh day (Shabbat) is a day of rest. Shmita is a year of rest. Every seventh year, all outstanding debts are canceled. The land lies fallow. Slaves and servants are set free. Agriculturally speaking, there is a benefit. Resting the soil for a year allows for replenishment of nutrients. Rabbinically speaking, less time devoted to agricultural concerns meant more time devoted to Torah study! Parsha Bechukotai, being the end of Leviticus, tells us the ramifications for behavior. “If you’ll keep the commandments… then I’ll send the rains in their time, the earth and trees will give forth their produce, you’ll settle securely in the land…I will multiply you…I will walk with you” (Lev. 25:3-10). If we don’t live up to these standards, if we neglect to add Kedushah (holiness) to our lives, if we “don’t perform these commandments, if we consider these decrees loathsome, if we reject these ordinances, if we annul the covenant, then I will do the same to you…. (Lev. 26:14:17) God will annul us. All blessing will become curses.

            While the curses in the Torah portion don’t paint a very pleasant picture, both parshiot reflect the vital importance of Bitachon, trust in God. In Behar, this idea of Bitachon is evident in the commandments of Shmitta (the 7-year agricultural cycle) and Yovel (Jubilee). In the Jubilee year, all debts are canceled, and there is a quasi-national “reboot”. While it may sound nice for those of us with credit card debt, consider the turmoil. The economy would come to grinding halt in the months and perhaps year or two before. What lender would lend knowing that the loan gets canceled in 6 months or a year?  In the Shmitta year, the land lies fallow. We all agree that the field needs a rest, a Shabbat, just like we do. If the fields lie fallow, what would people eat? We are urged to trust God. “I will command my blessing upon the sixth year and it will bring forth (enough) produce for three years (Lev. 25:20-21). Just like God provided a double portion of Manna on Friday and thereby guarantee enough food for Shabbat, so too God will “guarantee” enough produce in the sixth year. B’nai Yisroel won’t starve in the seventh (Shmita) year.

            So what does the Torah teach us? We learn that every rung climbed towards Kedusha, confirms our trust in God. We trust that God is Holy, otherwise, we would have no need to be holy. We trust that everything pure and good is attributable to God. Otherwise, we would constantly defile ourselves. We trust that we are created in God’s image. Otherwise, there is no reason to treat people with kindness first. Trust in God, in a sense, provides the foundation for our own individualized Mishkan. The Mishkan was built so that God would dwell among us. The very act of Bitachon (trust in God) is a demonstration of Holiness. As I finished explaining what I think about during my hour and ten-minute walk each way, the other fellow became more intrigued. From his perspective, a person had the opportunity to think/study Torah for several miles and when not thinking about Torah, he was thinking about his family, Tzedakah (charity), and helping those in need (Chesed). Funny, I just needed something to think about on Shabbat while walking back and forth. This mean reminded me that I had figured out a way to make that particular walk just a bit more holy than a walk on any other day.  

Peace,

Rav Yitz 

Delilah She Gained Old Samson's Mind When First He Saw This Woman, She Looked So Fine (Learned from Rev. Gary Davis - "Samson & Delilah"

Raising teen-age girls has made me extra sensitive to issues concerning self-image, peer pressure, social cliques, and body image. Try as we might to create an environment where are daughters will learn the tools to deal with the perils of social cliques and peer pressure; all the social network apps that our daughter “must be on” make our job that much more difficult. Try as we might to create an environment where deeds, substance, effort and the content of character receive more praise and are held in much higher regard than the superficiality of physical appearance and fashion; television, fashion magazines and the desire to fit in and be socially accepted makes our job more difficult. So what does our fifteen year old do this week heighten my concern over the tumultuous nature of teenagers, their self-image, popularity and sense of self-worth. She decides to run for Vice President of Student Council. All week, she and several friends have been making posters and videos, creating slogans and putting together a campaign. With the advice of her older sister who is actually in the political campaign business, the candidate has spent the week speaking to as many of the students as possible.  All of her siblings have been helping on this campaign. So from that perspective it is nice see our children working together so that one can accomplish something. On the other hand I know that running for office in Student Council is not exactly the same as running for office at the municipal, provincial/state or federal level. Running for office at the student council level is far more brutally honest. It is strictly a popularity contest. There are no real issues per se. And certainly one can’t “buy” the election with Super-Pac money or millions of small on line donations. What makes student council politics a brutal endeavor is the fact that is a popularity contest. So who are the teen age girls that tend to be the most popular? That’s right, the girls with the most pleasant and appealing appearance tend to be considered popular. They might not necessarily be well liked, but everyone know who they are. Needless to say, I can’t help but notice the irony of the week. Our daughter who we raise to have a positive self-image spent the week participating in a school activity that focuses upon those very qualities that can demean self- image.

This Shabbat we read from Parshat Emor. The four chapters that comprise Parsha Emor focus on the various aspects of Perfection. First the Torah focuses upon the importance of the spiritual perfection and purity of the Kohen. He must remain in a perpetual state of purity. He is restricted in terms of whom he can marry. He is restricted in regards for whom he can mourn. He cannot go to a cemetery. He cannot make sacrificial offerings if he has physical abnormalities. The second of the four chapters reminds B’nai Yisroel that when approaching God with an offering, the individual must be spiritually pure and perfect and so must the offering. These offerings must come directly from the individual making them and not from “the hand of a stranger” (Lev.22:25). The third chapter of the Parsha deals with the perfection and the purity of time. Time is define as perfect in the season follow an order, the holidays such as Shabbat, Pesach, Shavuot, Sukkot, Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur are designated to come in a particular order. That order is both pure and perfect since time and the designation of “Sacred” time comes from God. The fourth chapter speaks about maintaining purity and the perfection of physical space in this case the Mishkan, and all that is in the Mishkan. The Torah even deals with perfection and purity of human relationships and the punishments meted out when that perfection, purity and holiness is violated. In a sense, this last chapter reminds us of God’s charge to B’nai Yisroel.

Like running for student council places an emphasis upon physical appearance as it relates to popularity; the Torah places an emphasis upon the physical appearance of the Kohen as it relates to his spiritual purity and eligibility of serving as the Kohen Gadol.  The last eight verses (21:16-24) explain all the physical abnormalities that exclude the Kohen from assuming the position of Kohen Gadol. Blemishes, blindness, being lame, having any  broken bones, bad skin, abnormally long eyebrows, a blemish in his eyed, are but a few of the physical attributes that make a Kohen ineligible for the position of Kohen Gadol.   How can the Torah, with its primary focus upon Mitzvot (commandments) and the importance of deeds and the Kavanah, the intentionality behind those deeds, now focus upon something as superficial as appearance? Sefer HaChinuch comments: “At the root of the precept lies the reason that most actions of people are acceptable, appealing to the heart of those who see them, in accordance with the eminence of those who do them. For when a man is distinguished in his appearance and good in his actions, he will find grace and good understanding (Prov. 3:4). With all that he does in the eyes of all who observe him. Should he be, however the opposite of this- inferior in his form, or peculiar in his limbs then eve if he is correct in his ways, his activities will not be so attractive to the hear…” (Emor 275). As upsetting and politically incorrect as that sounds, the comment and the Torah text infer a keen understanding of human nature. While watching the physically flawed Kohen conducting the ritual slaughtering in a perfectly correct manner; our attention would be upon the flaw in appearance, our Kavanah our intention would be lacking and the sacrificial process would fail.

While this line of reasoning doesn’t offer any solace to the Kohen with the physical flaw or abnormality, and I don’t for a second agree with it; it is important to remember that the goal is making sure that the offerings are accepted and the Kavanah (the intention) behind the offering is pure and focused. The common person making the offering would lose focus by concentrating more upon the physical abnormality or flaw instead of the offering to God.  Thankfully we don’t have a Third Holy Temple. We have evolved beyond animal offerings as a means engaging God in a sacred relationship. However, human nature has remained fairly consistent.  All these decades later the Home Coming King and Queen are still very good looking and popular, and running for Student Council remains a popularity contest as well. Maybe what really matters is not winning a popularity contest but rather, putting oneself out there as the offering, external physical flaws and all, and showing people the good and the pure within. Maybe having the courage to run and be exposed to the vulnerability of losing truly is a measure of the content of character. Maybe if the voters see that in a candidate, then running for Student Council isn’t so bad.

Peace,

Rav Yitz

She Went Down To A Tailor's Shop And Dressed In Man's Array ( "Jack A-Roe" - Traditional Folk Song)

Earlier this week, there was a particularly disturbing news story about three teenage British girls (15,15,16) who packed their respective suitcases, went to the airport, boarded a flight to Turkey, and from there planned to make their way across the border into Syria and join ISIS. As the story broke, the parents of these teenagers were interviewed shaking their heads, shocked that their daughters had become radicalized. Their sibling were interviewed and they begged from their sisters to return to England knowing that once they enter Syria and join ISIS they will never be able to leave. Each news story showed the three girls wearing the traditional garb of religious Muslim women including a hijab (traditional scarf head covering). If and when they arrive in Syria and join ISIS; they will add a niqab (face covering) and burka (a full body cloak).  At first we all thought that hijab was an expression an Islamic woman’s extreme religious fervor. By the time the news story finished and we saw the niqab and the burka, we realized that the hijab was actually an expression of moderate religious fervor compared to the other two articles of clothing. Soon after the story broke, we were in a mall and my son and I were walking in front of two woman wearing the entire uniform: head covering, face covering and full body cloak. We were wearing our kippot.  We heard the two woman speaking Arabic. Maybe it’s the times in which we live, maybe it’s my own ignorance, maybe it’s a bias that has developed over the past 15 to 20 years, maybe it’s the images that I see in digital media or print media regarding Islamic fundamentalism, terrorist attacks, and the every increasingly loud call for Jihad; but I held my son’s hand just a little tighter, walked just a little quicker and was just a little bit uncomfortable. I felt this way simple because of the clothing that these woman were wearing.

This Shabbat, we read from Parshah Tetzaveh, and in it we learn about the uniform of the Kohen Gadol, the High Priest. Just like last week’s Parshah was a series of instructions on the way in which a physical space becomes beautified and holy, Parshah Tetzaveh offers a series of instructions on the way in which a certain individual’s physical appearance is beautified, and glorious. From head to toe, we are told that each item of the Kohen Gadol’s priestly uniform is made of fine linen, valuable stones, gold, cotton silk turquoise wool to name just a few of the ingredients. Certainly we could understand the Parshah from a superficial perspective but to do so would be to misunderstand a deeper and perhaps more powerful message. We live in a society where “clothes make the man”. Make no mistake, clothing also make the woman. Clothing defines who and what we are, and sometimes it defines our beliefs and even the depth and fervor of that belief. However Parshah Tetzaveh is teaches us something radically different. Instead of clothing making us look sharper, slimmer, better proportioned, what if clothes could express our intelligence, our emotional health, our sense of decency, the holiness that exists within our soul and the degree to which that holiness is expressed. What would such clothes look like? Such clothes would have to express the degree to which we have permitted God into our lives. Such clothes would have to express the holy magnificence of God’s presence within our lives.

            The Torah is very clear as to the reason for such highly decorative, highly ornate clothing. V’Kidashti et Ohel Mo’Ed v’Et Ha’Mizbeach V’Et Aharon v’Et Banav Akadesh L’Chahen Li – I shall sanctify the Tent of Meeting and the Altar; and Aaron and his sons shall I sanctify to minister to Me (Ex. 29:44). God’s presence will make the Tent of the Meeting holy. In other words, God’s presence will make a particular space holy.  Aaron and his son’s, serving on behalf of the people must achieve a higher degree of holiness compared to the rest of the people since Aaron and his sons work on behalf of the people directly dealing with God. This higher level of holiness must exist both inside and outside. Any inconsistency renders his the Kohen Gadol impure. If the clothes become physically dirty, then he is momentarily impure. If his heart wanders, if his mind is elsewhere, if he has not completely given of himself to the process and the service to God on our behalf, then he is momentarily impure as well.

            If this was seventy five years ago we would be uncomfortable if we saw young men in brown shirts, tall leather boots and a swastika. If this was twenty years ago we would be uncomfortable if we saw a group of teenagers  with shaved heads, tattoos, and symbols of Aryan Nation on their jackets. Nowadays if we see men and woman, dressed in clothing that is not only the clothing of religious fervor but is clothing that has been co –opted by Muslim extremists that want to bring harm to the world. While clothing always expressed socio-economic status, religious belief, political affiliation and gang affiliation; now the combination has become much more toxic and dangerous to those vulnerable young people being actively recruited in the by a perverse and evil ideology.

Peace,

Rav Yitz

Clergymen In Uniform (Bob Dylan - "When I Paint My Masterpiece")

            This past Sunday was Super Bowl Sunday. Frankly I think our daughters were more excited for the halftime show with Bruno Mars as opposed to the game. After about ten minutes, our son grew bored (as did most of the rest of the viewing public) and he waited eagerly for the halftime show as well. Whenever my children sit with me and watch a sporting event, I am asked to identify each team by the color of their respective jersey. This game was somewhat different. Since they watched some of the pregame, they quickly learned about the teams and their corresponding jerseys. So instead of being asked which team was which; our daughters displayed some maturity. Each one picked a team to cheer.  No, they did not choose the team because they were familiar with players or coaches. Nor they did not pick a team because they knew that Denver had the best offense and Seattle had the best defense. Nor did they pick a team because they had some emotional attachment to Denver or Seattle. As mature as they may be, my daughters reminded me, that at the end of the day, they are two sweet girls who know very little about football and care even less about football. They only thing they knew and cared about were the colors and patterns of the teams’ uniforms. They knew if they liked the orange or green.

            This week’s parshah, Teztzaveh, is about the clothing, the external beauty and magnificence of the Kohen Gadol, the High Priest. This week’s Parsha is all about dress codes, and looking appropriate. God explains to Moshe that both Aaron and his sons must go through a seven-day consecration ceremony. This ceremony consists of the priests wearing Bigdei Kahuna (Priestly clothes), and offering a sheep sacrifice every morning and afternoon. Besides this, a meal offering (grains) and a libation offering (wine) must accompany the sheep sacrifices. Keep in mind that the slaughtering of animals and then burning of these sacrifices will definitely cause a stench. Since air freshener in aerosol cans did not yet exist, God reminds Moshe that another altar must be built. This altar is for incense, which is to be burned all day and every day during this seven- day period.

            It seems kind of odd. Imagine getting all dressed up in a beautiful Chanel, or Armani suit in order to do lawn work, slaughter animals, or build a fire? The clothing doesn’t seem to be appropriate for the activity. It would appear that the Kohen Gadol might be a bit overdressed. Imagine the cleaning bills? So, why does God tell Moshe V’Asitah Vigdei Kodesh L’Aharon Achichah l’Chavod U’letifaret- and you shall make vestments of sanctity for Aaron your brother for glory and splendor. (Ex 28:2). The Parsha spends a lot of time describing gowns, turbans breastplates, forehead plates and tunics. Clearly the Torah considers these garments as sacred. Only the Priest can wear these garments, and only at the time of making sacrifices. These were very expensive glorious looking clothes to be used for sacrificing animals, sprinkling blood, and burning the sacrifice. The Kohen worked in the Mishkan, the place where God would dwell. Everything associated with the Mishkan must reflect the fact that God dwells there. Like a king’s palace reflects royalty, those who serve in the king’s court would also dress appropriately no matter the type of person. The Sefer HaChinuch explains that the magnificence and beauty also served to inspire awe in the hearts of all who came, and as a result, they were drawn closer to God. Anything that looked less than “beautiful” would be out of place. This explains why the Priest did not have a cleaning bill. Once the clothes became soiled they were replace by new garments.

            Is Parsha Tetzaveh really teaching us that clothes make the man?  We learn that all this magnificence and beauty is in the context of the Priest serving God. We learn that all this magnificence and beauty is in the context of the Priest performing sacrifices to God, on behalf of themselves and the community. A relationship with God, who dwells among us, is based upon the creation of Zman Kodesh (holy Time) and Makom Kodesh (holy space). The holy place was the Mishkan, the Tabernacle and later the Bet HaMikdash, The Holy Temple. Following the destruction of the Temple, the Bet Midrash, (House of Learning), and Shul, (Synagogue), and even our own homes have become Holy Places. The holy time is Shabbat, the three times a day when we pray,  when we study Torah, when we light candles, and when we celebrate Holidays, or even the private moments between husbands and wives. Beauty and magnificence only serve to enhance this holy time and holy space. Beauty for its own sake, like cheering on a team because of the colors and patterns, is a rather empty and fleeting experience. Rather, the more time and energy we invest, the more we learn and celebrate those moments and in that space, the more meaningful the sacred time and space becomes.

Peace,

Rav Yitz