The Holy On Their Knees, The Reckless Are Out Wrecking, The Timid Plead Their Pleas (Robert Hunter & Jerry Garcia - "Days Between")

          Forgetting the fact that it’s October and that means baseball playoffs and eventually the World Series; There is something different during the days between Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur. The ten days in between the Jewish New Year and the Day of Atonement are known as the Aseret Yamei Teshuvah – the Ten Days of Repentance. Maybe what makes these days different are its purpose. During these ten days, we are supposed to ask forgiveness from others; this process culminates with Yom Kippur (Day of Atonement) when we ask forgiveness from God. Maybe what makes these different is that they are between Rosh Hashana and Yom Kippur. These days between mark a ten-day transition from one point in time to another. These days in between are truly a journey, not necessarily in terms of geography but spirituality. Each day is another leg in that spiritual journey culminating in a 25 hour moment (Yom Kippur) where we are as close to God as humanly possible. I become keenly aware of that journey very early in the morning when I attend Selichot services well before dawn breaks. My children are aware of it when during quiet moments they ask for forgiveness from each other or from me or my wife. These days in between are a time where we are supposed to find spiritual clarity. For it is spiritual clarity that will allow us to ask to be forgiven and it is spiritual clarity that allows us to have the chutzpah and the courage to strive towards holiness and God.

            In this week’s Parsha, Va’Yeileich, Moshe is now experiences for the last time a tremendous moment of clarity. However of all the moments of clarity including: the Burning Bush, the Revelation at Sinai, the Personal Revelation when he saw the back of God while defending B’nai Yisroel following the episode of the Golden Calf; it is the moment of death to which we can all relate. It is at the moment of impending death that Moshe has perfect clarity. He sees and understands the anguish that his children will experience as they drift towards and away from their Covenant with God. He sees all that his life has been and he recognizes that while his life will be no more, there will be closure. Ki Yadati Acharei Motie Ki Hashcheit Tashchitun v’Sartem Min HaDerech Asher Tziviti Etchem V’Karat Etchem Ha’Ra’Ah B’Acharit Hayamim Ki Ta’Asu et Ha’Rah B’Einei Adoshem L’Hachiso B’Ma’Asei Y’deichem – For I know that after my death you will surely act corruptly, and you will surely act corruptly, and you will stray from the path that I have commanded you, and evil will befall you at the end of days, if you do what is evil in the eyes of HaShem, to anger Him through your handiwork (Deut.31:29). We should note that closure does not necessarily mean that the content of the closure will be positive, however, the process of closure is always positive. 
          Our sages are adamant about the vital importance of closure. If a person engages in Tshuvah, a repentant return to God, and Vidui, confession even if the moment before death it is tantamount to a person who has returned to living a life of Mitzvot. In a moment of clarity, certainly such a moment exists at death, Moshe has the opportunity to make that moment holy, sanctified, an un-wasted moment. We seek forgiveness from God, and we seek forgiveness from family and friends. Mostly, it seems to me, that during these ten days we honestly look at ourselves and assume that we have hurt others instead of being shocked when we find out that we are capable of hurting another. The ability to engage in this process known as Shuvah, the process of returning to the holiest aspect of our being, requires great clarity. Sometimes clarity occurs during a beautiful autumn day. Sometimes clarity comes on a starry night. Sometimes clarity comes sipping coffee at sunrise. Sometimes clarity comes at childbirth. Sometimes clarity comes when you tuck your children into bed and wish them sweet dreams. Sometimes clarity comes at the death of a loved one. Sometimes, clarity comes at one's impending death.
            I don't expect my teenage children to anticipate the moments when they will have a moment of clarity. Nor do I think they know when they will have those moments of clarity. However, they have them. Frequently it will occur when they can relate to some experience in a personal manner, or the moment may occur during a particular class. Sometimes they will have the moment when they hear about the difficult moments that friends or acquaintances may have. The important thing is that when it happens they are aware. When they ask me about my moments of clarity. I know it happens when I hear about the difficulties of others when I visit a person in the hospital when I listen to a person describe the life of a loved one who recently passed away. However, being aware of these days in between, these transitional moments presents us with greater opportunity to have moments of clarity and with greater clarity comes a greater perspective. 

Peace
Rav Yitz

Close The Gap Of The Dark Years In Between (John Barlow & Bob Weir - "Cassidy")

Earlier in the week, our kids had a few days off and visited their grandparents in Rochester, NY. The plan was for my parents to drive the kids back to Toronto and spend the night, see their granddaughter play in her volleyball match and return to their home the next day. The day before they were to drive back to Toronto, I received a phone call from my father. His stomach was bad, he wasn’t feeling well, and he anticipated that driving on the designated day was problematic. Rather than listen, I grew incredibly impatient and told him that I would drive down to pick up my kids have dinner and drive back. He then asked me to spend the night and head back the next morning. I gave my father an earful as I shared by aggravation with him. He must have been feeling quite ill because he said that he didn’t feel well enough to yell back at me. I may have yelled a few other choice words, hung up, and prepared for an afternoon and evening of driving. When I arrived at my parents, my mother thanked for schlepping. In fact, she thanked me far too much. My father was lying in bed, I checked in on him. Again, he asked me to spend the night. I reminded him that if he felt too sick to fight with me, why would he keep asking me such a question and start a fight? After some more choice words, I told him I planned on eating dinner and returning to Toronto. As I sat with my mother and my two kids and ate dinner, my father sat down at the table. He looked pale and drawn. He smiled weakly and started to say something. I am not sure what he said, all I know is that I became acutely aware that both my parents are aging and that I want them to see their grandchildren whenever possible. Then I apologized for the way I spoke to my father and my impatience with him.

In this week’s Parsha, Ki Tisa, we read about Moshe and a nation entering into the apology process. We read about T’shuvah. The parshah begins with God telling Moshe to conduct a census and each adult should make a donation. Meanwhile, B’nai Yisroel had been getting quite worried while Moshe was up the mountain for 40 days and nights. So they had Aaron build a Golden Calf. Well needless to say, B’nai Yisroel’s idolatry (avodah zarah) did not exactly go unnoticed. God says “Let my anger flare up against them and I shall annihilate them…” (Ex. 32:10). Moshe was just as angry. “Moshe’s anger flared up, He threw down the tablets from his hands, and shattered them at the foot of the mountain” (Ex. 32:19). Moshe chastised the people and then went back up the mountain to placate God’s anger. After everyone calmed down, punishments were meted out.  As God and Moshe began the re-issuing of the two tablets. Moshe pleads for forgiveness on behalf of the people and then descends with the second set of tablets.

 God and Moshe grew closer. God had a new found respect for Moshe and his people, and Moshe had a new found closeness with God. So much so, that Moshe uttered the words “Hodi’eini nah et D’rachecha V’Eda’acha -Make your way known to me so that I may know You…Show me Your Glory” (Ex. 33:13:14). God re-issues his covenant with Moshe, and reveals himself to Moshe. What an incredibly powerful moment! Moshe sought forgiveness, and learned how to do so in a thoughtful and honest manner. Certainly, there was punishment. Certainly, there was fear. Yet the process lent itself to a closer, more loving, respectful, meaningful and deeper relationship. Rashi clarifies Moshe’s request. “Moshe said that he had failed to understand sufficiently what God had told him and he wanted God to accompany him and Israel not God’s angel”. Moshe wanted to understand God’s way of bestowing reward. Reward was a function of spiritual proximity. Moshe’s apology was expressed in the form of a request. How do I attain greater spiritual proximity? “How do I find favour in your eyes” (Ex. 33:12)?   This closer, more awesome relationship is a product of doing T’shuvah, repentance. As a nation we had never sought repentance. As a nation, we did not even know what repentance was. As a nation, as children, we were just told to behave.  We had not tested the ramifications for not obeying. Now, B’nai Israel had made a grievous mistake. This mistake emanates from a maturing group.  However part of the spiritual maturation process, like any growth process is falling down, making mistakes, and then knowing enough to seek repentance, to do T’shuvah. Moshe did this on behalf of B’nai Yisroel. Moshe wanted to apologize not only to protect the people but also to gain a deeper comprehension in order to become spiritually closer.

            Perhaps there is no experience more humbling than asking for forgiveness.  To truly seek forgiveness, one must put aside one’s own ego, as well as one’s feeling of shame and embarrassment.  If our egos are too large, if we are too ashamed and too embarrassed then we will prevent ourselves from humbly seeking forgiveness and we remain distant As children, adults, and as a people, we all need a way to apologize in a meaningful, honest and thoughtful manner. We all need a safe haven to issue such an apology. Then when punishment is meted out, we understand that it is a result of behavior and not for being. No matter how long we remain negligent in our behavior and observance there is a way back towards God and Torah. However the impetus is upon us. We must take the first steps. We must go through some introspection, some tough honesty, and some self-reflection because that formula demands it. Otherwise the words are rather empty. Only then can we achieve meaningful repentance and stand in close proximity to God. Only then can we achieve a sense of self-contentment, inner peace and spiritual radiance. “When Moshe descended from Mount Sinai… Moshe did not know that the skin of his face had become radiant” (Ex. 34:29).

Shabbat Shalom,

Rabbi Lipson

Look Into Any Eyes You Find By You; You Can See Clear To Another Day (Robert Hunter & Phil Lesh - "Box of Rain")

Several hours before the Rosh HaShanah holiday began, my wife and I received an email from our daughter who is studying in Israel for the year. Since she arrived, her main form of communication has been phone calls or texts messages through Whatsapp. So when I saw an email from her, I was concerned. Don’t ask me why I should be concerned about getting an email from my daughter; I guess as I grow older and worry more and more. (I guess I am becoming more like my father.) So I read our daughter's email. I welled up. She explained that she did not have classes the day before Rosh HaShanah. Apparently, it was a beautiful day in Jerusalem, yet our daughter was experiencing the first twinges of homesickness as this was the first time that she was away during the High Holidays. She explained all this to us in her email and amid the twinges of homesickness and the welling up of tears, our daughter thanked us. She not only thanked us for giving her the opportunity to spend a gap year in Israel, she thanked us for the making her attend this particular seminary even though her teachers thought she would be happier elsewhere. She thanked us for not only seeing her in an honest and clear light but knowing what was best for her, as compared to her high school teachers. She thanked us for being her parents. I quickly wrote back two words. One word sums up the reason we wanted her to participate in sports as well as community service programs- Perspective. The other word allowed her to cope with hardship, discomfort or any challenge – clarity. Usually, clarity occurs when one is able to sense moments of extreme possibility. I know that I had great moments of clarity when each of my children was born. I also had great moments of clarity when my grandfather passed away a few years ago. Life and death allow us to get at the essence of life.

            In this week’s Parsha, Va’Yeileich, for the last time Moshe experiences a moment of clarity. However of all the moments of clarity including: the Burning Bush, the Revelation at Sinai, the Personal Revelation when he saw the back of God while defending B’nai Yisroel following the episode of the Golden Calf; it is the moment of death to which we can all relate. It is at the moment of impending death that Moshe has perfect clarity. He sees and understands the anguish that his children will experience as they drift towards and away from their Covenant with God. He sees all that his life has been and he recognizes that while his life will be no more, there will be closure. Ki Yadati Acharei Motie Ki Hashcheit Tashchitun v’Sartem Min HaDerech Asher Tziviti Etchem V’Karat Etchem Ha’Ra’Ah B’Acharit Hayamim Ki Ta’Asu et Ha’Rah B’Einei Adoshem L’Hachiso B’Ma’Asei Y’deichem – For I know that after my death you will surely act corruptly,  and you will stray from the path that I have commanded you, and evil will befall you at the end of days, if you do what is evil in the eyes of HaShem, to anger Him through your handiwork (Deut.31:29). We should note that closure does not necessarily mean that the content of the closure will be positive, however, the process of closure is always positive. Our sages are adamant about the vital importance of closure. If a person engages in Tshuvah, a repentant return to God, and Vidui, confession even if the moment before death it is tantamount to a person who has returned to living a life of Mitzvot. In a moment of clarity, certainly such a moment exists at death, Moshe has the opportunity to make that moment holy, sanctified, an un-wasted moment.

            This is a very special time of year for The Jewish People. It is a very spiritual time of year. This ten-day period from Rosh HaShanah until Yom Kippur is known as the Aseret Yamei Teshuvah – the Ten Days of Repentance. As the name suggests, this is the time of year in which we seek M’chila or forgiveness for any transgression we have committed. We seek forgiveness from God, and we seek forgiveness from family and friends. Mostly, it seems to me, that during these ten days we honestly look at ourselves and assume that we have hurt others instead of being shocked when we find out that we are capable of hurting another. The ability to engage in this process known as Tshuvah, the process of returning to the holiest aspect of our being, requires great clarity. Sometimes clarity occurs when one experiences a beginning, like a new life. Sometimes clarity comes at the conclusion, the death of a loved one. For our daughter clarity came on a beautiful autumn day in Jerusalem as she thought about the path of her life, leaving home, this current gap year and then onto college/university. Perhaps, Shabbat Shuvah,, the Shabbat of Return, reminds us of the importance of allowing those moments of clarity to serve as a source of spiritual strength.

Peace,

Rav Yitz

There Were Days Between, Summer Flies And August Dies, The World Grows Dark And Mean (Robert Hunter & Jerry Garcia "Days Between")

Every morning for the past week, I have been waking up earlier than normal and, along with a few other people, attended Selichot. Selichot are penitential prayers, supplications and poetry invoking God as Judge, God as Merciful, and a God that remembers biblical ancestors. I usually sit in my spot, with a mug of coffee and follow as the Baal Tefillah begins the service. For the first five to ten minutes I am not quite awake, after all the coffee hasn’t quite kicked in. Then I am involved following along, listening to the tune, and reading the words. At some point each morning during Selichot, I have a moment, a moment where I begin asking all the existential questions. Where am I in my life? What exactly have I accomplished in my life? Am I the best possible me that I can be? The answers aren’t so positive nor uplifting and if I ended the process then, I would probably be diagnosed with Depression. But the process doesn’t end there. As I continue working my way through the Selichot liturgy, it concludes with reminders and reassurances. Maybe the existential answers to my existential questions are not particularly uplifting. However I know that I am not alone. The Selichot service concludes with a series of statements including the refrain: Hu Aneinu- He answers. That is re-assuring.  Maybe my supplications and prayers are not answered at that moment. However my moment of clarity leaves me with a stronger faith, a faith that eventually there will be an answer. I just need to stay engaged and involved and maybe the difficult question that leave me troubled will eventually be resolved and leave me comforted.

We are keenly aware that we are in a very special time of year. We are in the midst of a very spiritual time of year. We are in the midst of a ten day period from Rosh HaShanah until Yom Kippur knows as the Aseret Yamei T’shuvah – the Ten Days of Repentance. As the name suggests, this is the time of year in which we seek M’chila or forgiveness for any transgression we have committed. We seek forgiveness from God, and we seek forgiveness from family and friends. Mostly, it seems to me, that during these ten days we honestly look at ourselves and assume that we have hurt others instead of being shocked when we find out that we are capable of hurting another. The ability to engage in this process known as Shuvah, the process of returning to holiest aspect of our being, requires great clarity.   Sometimes clarity comes on a starry night. Sometimes clarity comes sipping coffee at sunrise. Sometimes clarity comes at childbirth. Sometimes clarity comes when you tuck your children into bed and wish them sweet dreams. Sometimes clarity occurs during on a beautiful autumn day. Sometimes, clarity comes amidst a hurricane as Hurricane Matthew batters the Florida Coast, and the south eastern U.S. coast. Sometimes clarity comes at the death of a loved one. Sometimes, clarity comes at one's impending death.

            In this week’s Parsha, Va’Yeileich, Moshe is now experiences for the last time a tremendous moment of clarity. However of all the moments of clarity including: the Burning Bush, the Revelation at Sinai, the Personal Revelation when he saw the back of God while defending B’nai Yisroel following the episode of the Golden Calf; it is the moment of death to which we can all relate. It is at the moment of impending death that Moshe has perfect clarity. He sees and understands the anguish that his children will experience as they drift towards and away from their Covenant with God. He sees all that his life has been and he recognizes that while his life will be no more, there will be closure. Ki Yadati Acharei Motie Ki Hashcheit Tashchitun v’Sartem Min HaDerech Asher Tziviti Etchem V’Karat Etchem Ha’Ra’Ah B’Acharit Hayamim Ki Ta’Asu et Ha’Rah B’Einei Adoshem L’Hachiso B’Ma’Asei Y’deichem – For I know that after my death you will surely act corruptly, and you will surely act corruptly, and you will stray from the path that I have commanded you, and evil will befall you at the end of days, if you do what is evil in the eyes of HaShem, to anger Him through your handiwork (Deut.31:29). We should note that closure does not necessarily mean that the content of the closure will be positive, however the process of closure is always positive. Our sages are adamant about the vital importance of closure. If a person engages in Tshuvah, a repentant return to God, and Vidui, confession even if the moment before death it is tantamount to a person who has returned to living a life of Mitzvot. In a moment of clarity, certainly such a moment exists at death, Moshe has the opportunity to make that moment holy, sanctified, an un-wasted moment.

            On this Shabbat Shuvah, this Shabbat of Return, let us be reminded and strengthened to accept moments of clarity. Let us be wise enough to deal with such moments of clarity in the most holy of endeavors. Let us be pro-active enough to take advantage of moments of clarity by moving towards our loved ones. Let us be spiritually aware enough and realize the absolute importance of moving towards God. Let us not wait until we become aware of an impending loss. Instead, during the Aseret Yamei T’shuva, we should be spiritually clear enough to see every moment as an opportunity to return to that which is holy.

Peace,

Rav Yitz

That Path Is For Your Steps Alone (Robert Hunter & Jerry Garcia - "Ripple")

It’s that time of year again. We have weathered “Black Friday”. We have withstood “Cyber Monday”. It is impossible to find parking at the mall, and I dread running into pick up one item at stores like Costco or Target because the checkout lines are absolutely brutal.  Thankfully, from this chaos of Holiday Shopping, our family has engaged in one Holiday Season ritual: we have watched It’s a Wonderful Life. We will probably watch it two or three times. For me, it is one of my top five movies (The Godfather I and II, Cool Hand Luke, The Big Lebowski, and Charade being the other four). One of the themes of It’s a Wonderful Life is that an individual’s life touches many other lives. Sometimes we explicitly affect others lives, sometimes we implicitly affect other lives. Perhaps we may never know the extent to which we affect and influence others' lives. However, as George Bailey watches people from his town give a few dollars to help him out of a difficult financial bind, he becomes acutely aware that everything he did, every decision he made, every trial and tribulation, every joyous moment and every difficult moment were necessary parts of his life. All of which allowed him to arrive at this final moment; a moment in which he was able to experience the holiness of an act of Loving Kindness.

 This week’s Parshah, Vayechi is the conclusion of the book of Breishit (Genesis). Because this is the last Parshah of the Sefer B’reishit, we read of the passing of the mantle of power from one generation to the next. Yaakov is 147 years old and it is time for him to bless his children and his grandchildren. To each of his twelve sons, he offers a blessing. To Yosef’s sons, Ephraim and Manasseh, he not only offers a blessing but he reserves the blessing of the first born to the younger brother, Ephraim.  This is fitting. Yaakov also received the blessing reserved for the first born. He also leaves Yosef with one last mission. Yaakov tells Yosef of the covenant that God made with Avraham, Yitzchak and himself. He also made Yosef swear an oath that he would bring him out of Egypt and bury him with his father and grandfather. Yosef accepts this oath. He and his brothers leave Egypt and bury their father. Because the famine remains pervasive throughout the land, they return to Egypt. Now the brothers fear Yosef’s wrath. Although he has not expressed any anger towards them, the brothers believe now that their father is dead; Yosef’s anger will not be contained. First they sent servants to Yosef in order to plead on their behalf. Then the brothers plead to Yosef and prostrate themselves before Yosef. Yosef’s response indicates his maturity, his spiritual contentment and his peace with himself and his environment. Vayomer Aleihem Yosef Al Tirau Ki Hatachat Elohim Ani -“But Joseph said to them, ‘Fear not, for am I instead of God? V’Atem Chashavtem Alai Ra’ah Elohim Chashava L’Tovah L’Ma’An Asah KaYom HaZeh LHaChayot Am Rav - Although you intended me harm, God intended it for good: in order to accomplish, it is as clear as this day, that a vast people be kept alive.  V’Atah Al Tirau Anochi Achalkeil Etchem V’et Tapchem Vayinachem Otam Vayidaber al Libam -So now fear not, I will sustain you and your young ones.’ Thus he comforted them and spoke to their heart.” (Gen: 19-21) Yosef bears no animosity towards his brothers. The tears he shed in last week’s Parshah, VaYigash, were genuine. The joy of re-uniting with his family without rancor and bitterness overwhelmed any negative or bitter feelings. Yosef understands and accepts his place. Yosef understands that he had to experience all the tsuris and all the simcha of his life in order to arrive at that point in time and in that manner. Yosef arrived at that moment without bitterness. He chose not to have bitterness. Rather, his faith and sense of self provided enough strength for him to make peace, achieve contentment, and appreciate the path that his life had taken.

It took George Bailey to sink to his lowest point, wishing he “had never been born” in order to understand that by living life, by working hard, by trying to make a difference, he ultimately did. Like most of us, we don’t always get to see how our deeds and actions make a difference to those lives we touch. Like George Bailey, Yosef understood all this. He too had to go through all kinds of difficulty, namely an estrangement from his family for more than twenty years, in order for him to learn the lesson that that everything has to happen in order for us to arrive at this point in time. Both George Bailey and Yosef teach us to try hard, to do our best, never lose faith and don’t allow negative feelings to overwhelm us to the point of becoming embittered souls. Ultimately we need to learn and eventually accept that everything unfolds the way it does in order for us to be here at this moment in time.

Peace,

Rav Yitz