Wednesday, April 29, 2020

I Thought I Heard A Young Man Mourn This Morning (Bonnie Dobson - "Morning Dew")

          Earlier this week, amid the ongoing pandemic of Covid 19, Israel stopped to commemorate their fallen soldiers and those who died from acts of terror, and then Israel stopped to celebrate its Independence. Earlier this week, Israel observed Yom HaZikaron and celebrated Yom Ha’Atzmaut. During Yom HaZikaron, my wife, children, and I attended a funeral in Israel. A 16-year-old former bunkmate of our son tragically passed away. My wife knew the parents from summer camp, they were at our son’s Bar Mitzvah in Eretz Yisroel. As we watched the funeral via YouTube, we listened to eulogies given by a teacher, by his Rav, and by his father and older sister. My wife cried, my daughters and I welled up in tears, our son sat, stunned, silent. The father spoke of his son, his wonderful attributes, as a son, a brother, as a grandson, and as a friend. He alluded to Avraham Avinu, the “ten tests” that the Talmudic sages explain the events told in the Torah culminating in Akedat Yitzchak (the Binding of Isaac). We listened and our hearts sank given the pain and sorrow this family has experienced now experiencing the unfathomable of losing a child. Yet it was the words of his older sister that were so powerful and heartbreaking. She explained that a recent school assignment had been to determine a before and “after point” in one’s life, a point where an event altered the sense of life’s path. She explained that this moment, on this Yom HaZikaron would be her “after point”. An aspect of her young teenage life will forever be oriented around memory, the memory of her brother, and all of his wonderful qualities. She explained that any friend she makes in the future, any boyfriend, or her husband, will only know of her brother through her memory. If she is blessed with children, they will never know their uncle except through her memory. This will be her ‘after point’. Of course, the”‘after point” assumes that the survivor continues to leade a meaningful life comforted by memories of her brother’s life and his blessings.

         This Shabbat, like last Shabbat, we read from two Parshiot. This week we read the double Parsha of Acharei Mot/ Kedoshim. After two Parshiot, Tazria, and Metzorah, which essentially interrupted the narrative and the laws that had been focused upon the Kohanim, we now return to the Kohen as the central focus in the Parsha. Now that he has become spiritually pure, the Torah is now ready to teach the laws for the spiritual purity of the nation. We have focused upon the impurities of individuals, now we focus upon the community. The Kohen acts on behalf of the nation just like he acts on behalf of the individual. The Torah teaches us the laws for the offerings of Yom Kippur, national atonement, and Azazel otherwise known as the Scapegoat. The Scapegoat is not offered as a sacrifice to God, but rather is sent out from the camp and left to wander in the wilderness eventually succumbing to the elements. The second half of the Parsha focuses on the holy and holy relationships within the family. However, the list of inappropriate behaviors between family members is taught within the context of the other nations. The list of inappropriate behavior in terms of worship, in terms of caring for the employer and employee, between the vulnerable and the well-off, between people are all taught within the context of other nations. Essentially other nations provide a standard of inappropriate behavior.

         However, it is somewhat odd that the standards for inappropriate behavior come from two distinct places. One place is Egypt; the place where this journey began. The other place is Eretz Canaan; the place where this journey is supposed to conclude. The Torah considers both places impure, and unholy. Both places engage in behavior that the Torah considers not only bad but behavior deemed to be an abomination. In both places, Egypt and Canaan, the dominant culture worshiped death and didn’t sanctify life. Human sacrifices are made, the vulnerable are not taken care of, and there is no mechanism in place for a community to ever return to a previous point of spiritual purity and sanctity – T’Shuvah (repentance). In fact, both places, the place of origin and place of destination are so impure, the abominations are so deplorable that to mimic such behavior is tantamount to spiritual death. The only example, the only other being to mimic and to imitate learned behavior is God. Vi’Heyitem Li Kedoshim Ki Kadosh Ani Adoshem Va’Avdil Etchem Min Ha’Amim Li’heyot Li You shall be holy for me for I, Hashem, am holy; and I have separated you from the People’s to be mine. (Lev. 20:26). Rashi explains that Holiness is the act of sanctifying life, and if B’nai Yisroel’s behavior is not distinct from the nations as “belonging to Nebuchadnezzar and his colleagues.” No, Rashi is not suggesting that a failure to observe mitzvot and follow God’s Torah is the equivalent of a man that destroyed Jerusalem, the First Temple, and put B’nei Yisroel into exile. Rather, as the Chatam Sofer explains, that the failure to remain distinct from other nations risks B’nei Yisroel’s existence. Along with the risk of “disappearing” of assimilation comes the risk of losing collective memory.

          Even though he and his family were touched by death, Aharon and his two surviving sons leaned into life, served on behalf of B’nai Yisroel, followed God’s commandments, and continued striving towards holiness. Certainly, Aharon, his son’s and wife, experienced their own “after point” their own turning point. For the older sister who spoke so lovingly of her brother, she understood that she and her younger sisters had been touched by the death of their 16-year-old brother. She explained that there will be an Acharei Meit, an “after point” in which they will have to choose. Choose to disappear and cease living a life in which they strive for Kedoshim, or find a path to live a life of holiness whereby they live and thrive, and in doing so, the memory of their brother lives and thrives as well. II hope our children understood the lesson that this young woman learned and explained so beautifully and heartfelt.

Peace,
Rav Yitz

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