Friday, February 10, 2023

Then Give Hope To The Hopeless, The Helpless And The Homeless (Robert Hunter & Phil Lesh - "Wave To The Wind")

           Earlier this week, President Biden gave the State of The Union Address before a joint session of Congress, and all those who had tuned in. The President struck a note of hope.  He spoke of the growing frustration that people have when dealing with airlines, insurance companies, pharmaceutical companies,  and all the current sources of aggravation and inconvenience that everyday people experience.  Acknowledging that there are still many economically and politically alienated people, his goal remains to do as much as possible to create opportunities that mitigate the sense of alienation. He reminded Americans and the world that aspiring to the best version of America was still possible.  Several moments after the President’s State of the Union Address, the minority party’s response was offered by Sarah Huckabee, the former White House Director of Communications during the Trump Administration and the current Governor of Arkansas. She spoke of a Left Wing Cabal and registered the complaints that her former boss articulated seven years ago. She looked towards the past and spoke in a code that only the most passionate believers of her message would understand. President Biden spoke of the present and of the future in a language and using examples that everyone could understand and relate to. 

           In this week’s Parsha Yitro, there are two distinct narratives. The first narrative focuses on Moshe and his father-in-law Yitro.  Moshe leads B’nai Yisroel to Midian. While there, Moshe spends a little time with his wife, his two sons, and his father-in-law, Yitro. Yitro acknowledges that G-d has protected B’nai Yisroel and that the Lord is greater than all other gods. The next day, Yitro witnesses Moshe sit from morning to night mediating and adjudicating conflicts among B’nai Yisroel. Yitro understands that his son-in-law is overextended and the current method of governing is neither good for him nor for Amchah (the nation). Being both a Priest of Midian as well as his father-in-law, Yitro offers advice as both a father and a community leader. The second distinct narrative occurs, from chapters 19 through 20,  and focuses upon B'nai Yisroel’s revelation at Sinai.  The Parshah concludes with God’s declaration of the Aseret Dibrot, the Ten Commandments. The second part of the Parshah is very well known, incredibly unclear, and lends itself to numerous interpretations, commentaries, and Midrashim.  However, the two stories seem so disparate and could easily stand alone.  Why do these two separate narratives appear together in the same Parsha and how are they connected? 

           Yitro suggests to Moshe “You be a representative of God, and you convey the matters to God…you shall make known to them the path in which they should go and the deeds they should do. You shall discern from among the entire people, men of accomplishment, men of truth, men who despise money. You shall appoint them as leaders of thousands…they shall judge the people at all times, and they shall bring every major matter to you, and every minor matter they shall judge, and it will be eased for you, and they shall bear with you. If you do this thing and God shall command you, then you will be able to endure, and this entire people, as well, should arrive at its destination in peace.” (Ex. 18:19-23)  Yitro explains that a community must have a shared vision. To some degree, people need to know how to seek G-d on their own, and how to behave within a community. Others need to know God's ways in order to adjudicate and mediate conflicts or transmit information. Everyone must have access to G-d and G-d’s teaching. Only then will Moshe’s leadership responsibilities be light enough to bear. Only then will Amchah have a stake in the relationship with G-d. Only then will Moshe and B’nai Yisroel become willing participants in their covenant with G-d. Only then can this community uphold its role as a “priest to the nations”. Then and only then will Moshe and B’nai Yisroel arrive at its destination in peace.  However, Yitro’s suggestion is a top-down approach. Moshe sits atop.   After Moshe heeded his father-in-law’s advice, the preparation for the Revelation at Sinai occurs. While Moshe ascends and descends the mountain, the narrative focuses on B’nai Yisroel’s preparation, and its standing, waiting, and listening.  God instructs  Amchah to prepare for Revelation. The “entire people'' were in the camp, and they shuddered. Then Moshe brought the people from the camp toward God. (Ex 19:16-17). When presented with God’s covenant, “the entire people responded together and said, ‘everything that God has spoken we will do!’”(Ex 19:8) The narrative continually emphasizes that Revelation was not solely between God and Moshe.  B'nai Yisroel must be involved in the process. B’nai Yisroel must experience some aspect of Revelation. B’nai Yisroel must be active participants in Revelation. They were. They willingly and unanimously responded.  B’nai Yisroel’s unanimous response indicated that they were responsible and willing participants in the covenant. Their participation and the unanimous response indicated that they shared a common vision and purpose.

Moshe and B’nai Yisroel had a shared vision. Moshe experienced numerous revelations as an individual. However, at Sinia, he shared that revelation with B’nai Israel. As the leader, the disseminator of Law, and the one responsible for transmitting that law to the people, Moshe is responsible for not only transmitting law but doing everything he can to make sure that B’nai Israel has a shared and common vision, a sense of citizenship and common experience. By doing so, he improves the chances that this new society will be able to survive in the future. President Biden’s speech reflected that same idea. Speak in a language and from a common shared experience. That sense of shared common experience binds us as a people and offers the best chance of solving the problems of the future. 

Peace,
Rav Yitz

Wednesday, February 1, 2023

Believe It If You Need It Or Leave It If You Dare (Robert Hunter & Phil Lesh - "Box of Rain")

            Earlier this week, our son returned to Israel from his week in Poland. Also earlier this week, the United States Secretary of State, Anthony Blinken visited Israel. He met with Israel’s Prime Minister Netanyahu and he met with the Palestinian Authority leader Abbas. Just before Blinken’s arrival, there were a series of terrorist attacks in Jerusalem, including an attack last week on a synagogue on a Friday night.  There were reprisals by Israel, and then another terrorist attack. As I read about the increased tensions in Jerusalem, I find myself praying that my son remains safe and that he doesn’t happen to be in the wrong place at the wrong time if and when another terrorist attack occurs. I have always been a believer in the “two-state solution”. However, with each attack, my faith in the “two-state solution” erodes just a little. However, I am reminded of the words of Hadassah Froman. Hadassah Froman has managed to keep her faith. Hadassah Froman is a frum (Orthodox) Israeli. She is the mother-in-law of the young pregnant woman who was stabbed in Tekoa approximately seven years ago. Hadassah’s late husband was the late peace activist Rabbi Menachem Froman.  In an interview with Israel’s Army Radio, Rebbetzin Froman said, "Israel was ‘mishandling’ the delicate fabric of its relations with the Palestinian, and needed to make a greater effort to distinguish between those Palestinian who support terrorism and those who want to live in peace. Rebbetzin Froman continued by explaining that Israel needs to reach out to those Palestinians that wish to “Co-Exist”, to live in peace, and by strengthening those Palestinians, supporting those Palestinians, and keeping those Palestinians safe, it would go a long way in promoting a two-state solution. Her statement was poignant seven years ago when Netanyahu was the Prime Minister and it remains poignant especially now with a highly right-wing Netanyahu government compared to seven years ago.

            This Shabbat is known as Shabbat Shira (Shabbat of Songs) because of the "songs" or poetry in both the Parsha, Beshallach, and in Haftarah. In Parsha Beshallach, B'nai Yisroel finally leaves Egypt. Pharaoh sends them out and they hurriedly leave. Three days later, B'nai Yisroel arrives at the Yam Suf, the Reed Sea, which is along the Mediterranean coast. With Pharaoh's army behind them and the Sea in front, B'nai Yisroel is trapped. Then the sea opens up, and B'nai Yisroel crosses through and arrives safely on the other side. The Egyptian army gets caught in the sea - bed as the waters come crashing down. Out of joy and relief, B'nai Yisroel composes Shirat HaYam, the Song of the Sea. No sooner are they finished celebrating than they begin complaining about the lack of water and food. God provides water and Manna. However, B'nai Yisroel is still not safe. Now they are attacked by the indigenous tribe, the Amalekites. B'nai Yisroel must put aside its hunger and thirst and fight for its lives. They do, and they are victorious. The Parsha ends with God commanding Moshe to blot out the very existence of the Amalekites.

           From the time B’nai Yisroel complains to Moshe about the oncoming Egyptian army and Yam Suf that lies before them, to the lack of water, lack of food, and lack of meat, one could understand the entire Parsha as God testing B’nai Yisroel’s faith. With all the complaining, with the refrain of the people cynically asking Moshe if God brought them out of Egypt to have them die in the wilderness, or die on the banks of the Yam Suf. This is certainly a simple and straightforward way to understand that these newly released slaves as not at all ready to engage in a covenantal relationship with God since they lack faith. However, the Midrash in Shmot Rabbah teaches us that Nachshon ben Aminadov from the tribe of Judah went first into the Reed Sea even before it split open. In fact, the waters didn’t open up until he was completely submerged. Only then did the waters open due to his faith and the rest of B’nai Yisroel followed.  The sea didn’t part because of Moshe’s praying on behalf of the people; it split because of one man’s Emunah, one man’s faith that taking the next step forward would ultimately prove to be the step that saved a nation.  As a result of Nachshon’s faith, the tribe of Judah would have dominion over Israel.

            I am always intrigued by those who have the ability to keep faith under the most trying circumstances. I am amazed by the stories of those who questioned yet kept their faith in God during the Holocaust. I am struck by those who have faith in humanity's decency and goodness when they carry the scars inflicted by those whose souls are infected with the darkness of terrorism and extremism. I am amazed by those who have faith in the prospect of peace and co-existence despite the pain they have experienced by the murder of a loved one at the hands of those who don’t want to co-exist. To those people of faith, I applaud knowing deep down that I should follow them, and fight the terrorist agenda of living in fear.

Peace,
Rav Yitz 

Thursday, January 26, 2023

There Is A Road, No Simple Highway Between The Dawn And The Dark Of Night (Robert Hunter & Jerry Garcia- "Ripple")

            As part of our son’s gap year of study in Israel, he is currently spending the week in Poland. While there, he and his cohort, are studying Jewish life in Poland before The War and the destruction of that life during  The Holocaust. His first full day happened to be on the first day of the Hebrew Month Shevat, known as Rosh Chodesh Shevat. It also happened to be the day that he and his cohort spent some time at the Treblinka death camp. There, in the Treblinka, our son and his classmates prayed the Morning Service (davened Shacharit) and read from the Torah because it was the first day of the month. How incredibly spiritually powerful! In the midst of a place that was synonymous with death, a place of darkness and evil,  a place where so many souls were exterminated and then went up in ashes, sacred words of Torah were read, and for a brief moment that place became just a bit more holy.  The light of the Torah words, for a brief moment, shined through the darkness and bleakness of death.  Perhaps, those souls that were consumed by the fires of the crematorium knew just a bit of peace.

           This week's Parsha is Bo.  The ten plagues culminate with locusts, darkness, and finally the killing of the firstborn. On the night of the last plague, God instructs Moshe to tell B'nai Yisroel, to declare and sanctify the New Moon, and to slaughter a lamb for each family. Blood should be painted onto the door- post. The sacrificed lamb must be eaten entirely that night with no leftovers.  The command continues with God instructing Moshe to reiterate this story to the children of each family. The Parsha concludes with the commandment to sanctify the firstborn, remember this night, remember what God did for B'nai Yisroel, and remember that B'nai Yisroel eventually returned to the land.

        Parts of the Parsha are read on Pesach. Those parts dealing with the Paschal sacrifice, as well as the Mitzvah of "Telling" the child about the impending redemption, are read. However, there is one phrase that is particularly interesting and revealing. The ninth plague is Choshech, darkness. VaYomer Adonai el Moshe  N'Teih Yadchah al Hashamayim - And God said to Moshe "Stretch forth your hand toward the heavensVa'Yehi Choshech al Eretz Mitzrayim- "And there will be a darkness upon the land of Egypt, Vayameish Choshech - and the darkness will be felt. (Ex. 10:21). What does it mean that the darkness will be felt? What will it feel like? Will it be hot or cold, wet or dry? Maybe it will be thick like some type of fog. Maybe it will be the horrible emptiness as if one is falling through an abyss with nothing all around. Whatever kind of darkness it is, it can be felt. It is noticeable and therefore extraordinarily different than the standard night-time or even an eclipse. B’nai Yisroel still had light in their dwellings while the plague occurred. Pharaoh could not stand the darkness anymore and told Moshe to take everyone including the children and leave if that would alleviate the darkness in Egypt. The Or HaChaim, (18th Century Morocco) reminds us that while there was complete darkness in Egypt, there was light where the Jewish slaves lived: Goshen. U’LeChol B’nai Yisroel Haya Or B’Mishvotambut for all the Children of Israel there was light in their dwellings (Ex. 10:23). Egypt was already in a state of primordial Darkness, a spiritual darkness without the acknowledgment of God’s presence. As a result, Egypt had become a twisted, closed-minded, corrupt society whose enslavement of B’nai Yisroel was a function of ignorance and fear - a world devoid of the acknowledgment of HaShem. The plague of Choshech, of Darkness, was merely Egypt becoming aware of its darkness. As a result, Pharaoh all but pleaded with Moshe to take the slaves of Egypt. Eliminated the source of Egypt and Pharaoh’s fear, and then the light would return to Egypt.  B’nai Yisroel was already in a state of primordial Light, a spiritual acknowledgment of God’s presence; U’LeChol B’nai Yisroel  Haya Or B’Mishvotambut for all the Children of Israel there was light in their dwellings. B’nai Yisroel already had a sense of their relationship with God, and a sense of purpose. Moshe had already told them that they would be freed, and they would return to the land that had been promised to their ancestors.

          Each day our son has been in Poland has been a day in which they learned about the darkness that consumed Poland and Europe from 1939-1945. Each day our son has seen the light that existed in Poland prior to the war, the vibrancy of Jewish life, culture, and education prior to the war. With each day, our son and his fellow classmates have come to learn and appreciate how important it is for them to lead lives that bring light and goodness into the world, into the dark places of their respective communities.

Peace,
Rav Yitz

Wednesday, January 18, 2023

It's Even Worse Than It Appears (Robert Hunter & Jerry Garcia - "Touch of Grey")

           Earlier this week in Israel, a planned 5000-person demonstration against the new radical, right win, ultranationalist, ultraorthodox government that received 30,000 more votes than the other coalition,  became in reality, a demonstration of more than 80000 people. Friends of ours who live in and around Tel Aviv attended. The demonstration was not about issues of domestic policy or a peace plan. No, this demonstration was about the fundamental nature of Israel’s government. This was a demonstration about a country remaining a democracy that guarantees rights to all citizens no matter gender, sexual orientation, or denomination of Judaism.   Tom Friedman wrote a very difficult and troubling OpEd piece in the January 18th,  New York Times that challenges Jews,  those who describe themselves as friends of Israel, and what U.S. policy should be toward any country that has dangerously veered away from Liberal Democratic values and turned towards the authoritarian world like Turkey and Hungary. For the sake of Israel’s democracy, Friedman suggests that  The President, the most powerful spokesperson for Democracy, needs to convince Netanyahu that an authoritarian illiberal Jewish country is bad for the Jews and not in the West’s interest. 

          This Shabbat we read Parsha Va’Eira. In this Parshah, God reassured Moshe after Pharaoh mocked and dismissed both him and Aharon. God explains the plan to Moshe that Pharaoh’s heart will be hardened after each plague but eventually, Pharaoh will capitulate. God explains the various stages of redemption. The plagues begin. We are supposed to understand that each of these first seven plagues is more severe than the previous plague: Blood, Frogs, Lice, Wild Beasts, Animal plague, Boils, and Hail. Moshe requests that Pharaoh allows B’nai Yisroel to worship God for three days, Pharaoh sometimes acquiesces sometimes he doesn’t. Sometimes he asks Moshe to pray on his behalf and sometimes he doesn’t. One thing is clear, whenever Pharaoh gets his way (a plague ceases), something that would clearly indicate the power of God, Pharaoh acts almost like a child. He returns to his arrogant self-centered nature. Finally at the very end of the Parsha, after the plague of Hail has devastated the land and killed anything that was outside, Pharaoh expresses the evolution of his belief system.

          Two men, Moshe and Pharaoh experience a type of revelation. Each man’s revelation is shaped by who they are, their life experiences, and their outlook on the world. Each leader will experience something very different than what fits their current theological system. Moshe is told by God, “Ani Adoshem VaEira el Avraham El Yitzchak v’ El Yaakov B’Eil Shaddai U’Shmi Adoshem Lo Nodati LaHem I am Hashem, I appeared to Abraham, to Isaac, and to Jacob as El Shaddai, but with My Name Hashem, I did not make Myself known to them (Ex. 6:2) For Moshe, his revelation assumes questions.  Why did you, Hashem, reveal yourself one way to Abraham Isaac, and Jacob, and another way to me?  God will reveal himself to Moshe through “Signs and Wonders”.  V’Yadu Mitzrayim Ki Ani Adoshem, BinToti et Yadi Al Mitzrayim V’Hotzeiti et Bnai Yisroel MiTochamAnd Egypt Shall know that I am Hashem, when I stretch out My hand over Egypt; and I shall take the Children of Israel out from among them (Ex. 7:5). With each ensuing plague, Pharaoh and Egypt will experience God. For Pharaoh, the embodiment of a system that did not permit questions, the revelation was much more absolute and stark. That revelation would manifest itself in a series of plagues.

          Pharaoh’s world is harsh, he felt threatened by a minority culture and he believed that Egypt was threatened by that same minority culture. As a result, the blood, the frogs, the lice, swarms of wild beasts, livestock disease, boil, hail, locusts, and the death of the firstborn were perceived as plagues and God was perceived as a harsh judge with little mercy. Moshe had experienced kindness. His mother hid him in the basket, and Pharoah’s daughter drew him out of the basket and raised him as her own. After he demonstrated kindness to the slaves by attempting to protect them, he leaves Egypt and demonstrates kindness to Yitro’s daughters. Yitro takes in this stranger as his own son, and eventually, Moses marries Yitro’s daughter Zipporah.  Zipporah demonstrates kindness to Moshe when she perceives that his life is endangered because he didn’t circumcise their son in a timely fashion (Ex. 4:24-26). Because Moshe experienced kindness throughout his life and he demonstrated kindness to others; it only makes sense that God is not so much a harsh judge as God is merciful and kind.   Netanyahu managed to import the newest American products: a MAGA attitude for his 30,000-person majority, a mistrust of the judicial system, and the authoritarianism that has become popular in certain parts of the world. The cost will be devastating. By continuing down the path of authoritarianism and renouncing the civil rights of many of his citizens, Netanyahu brings his own plague upon Israel. 

Peace,
Rav Yitz

Wednesday, January 11, 2023

Carve Your Name In Ice And Wind (Robert Hunter & Jerry Garcia - "Foolish Heart")

        In the world of Marketing, “Brand” is everything. An iPhone is not just a cell phone. Kleenex is not only a facial tissue. January 6 isn’t just a date nor is 9/11. All of these items, these dates take on a deeper meaning than just the thing. They have a “Brand”. People also have “Brands”. Athletes are much more than athletes, they have a brand, and Air Jordan is perhaps the biggest brand. Indeed athletes understand the importance of their name. Their brand is ultimately dependent upon their name, and their statistics. Politicians, while running for office do everything they can to establish a brand. The worst politicians, the crassest dangerous politicians, are those that focus on their brand instead of the good of their respective political party and the people. Trump has a “brand”, Marjorie Taylor Green has a “brand”. For many that brand embodies nihilism, fascism, and authoritarianism. Recently a new politician arrived from the state of New York, specifically from Long Island. His name is purportedly George Santos. I use the term “purportedly” because Geroge Santos claimed to have graduated from college, claimed to have lost several employees in a mass shooting of a gay club in Florida, claimed that his mom was killed in 9/11, claimed to have worked for Citibank and Goldman Sacks,  and although raised Catholic, he claimed that his maternal grandparents were Jewish and Holocaust survivors. However, none of those claims are true. The politician that calls himself George Santos lied about everything. Even the Long Island Republican Party, the political party that supported his candidacy has renounced him and called for his resignation.  So if you lie about everything in your life, if you lie about who you are, yes you might have a name but it means nothing. Republican leadership in Long Island, which includes Georg Santos’ district understands that the Santos brand is toxic. Republican congressional leadership, in its crass and pathetic desire for power, keeps the Santos brand close by because it needs the vote. That is not only sad, and pathetic, but it diminishes democracy. Ultimately democracies require trust. George Santos has already broken that trust. 

          This week we begin the second book of the Torah; the Book of Exodus – Sefer Shmot, literally translated into “The Book of Names”. This second book begins with the Parsha Shmot –Names. The first few verses essentially recount the ending of the Book of Genesis. Shmot re-iterates the names of Jacobs’ sons and the fact that Jacob and his sons came to Egypt. We are reminded that Jacob had already died. We are reminded that the next generation, Jacob’s sons (including Yosef) passed away. A new king assumes the mantle of power and does not know of Yosef’s great deeds. Instead, the new Pharaoh believed that this foreign population was tantamount to a fifth column. Therefore this tribe must be enslaved in order to prevent their uniting with Egypt’s external enemies. We read about the birth and growth of Moses, and his flight to Midian. We read about his becoming a husband, a shepherd, and a father. We learn of his epiphany with the Burning Bush and God’s instructions plan to redeem B’nai Israel from slavery and Moshe’s role in the redemptive process.

          Considering, that this is a completely new Sefer, a new Book of the Torah and that the dominant theme of this new book is redemption from slavery and the national revelation at Mt. Sinai, why should begin with something as mundane as the re-iteration of the names of Jacobs’ sons: V’Eilah Shmot  B’nai Yisroel Ha’Baim Mitzrayaima Eit Yaakov Ish U’Veito Ba’u- And these are the name of the Children of Israel who were coming to Egypt with Jacob, each man, and his household came, Reuven Shimon, Levi, Yehuda; Issachar, Zebulun, and Benjamin; Dan Naphtali; Gad and Asher. We don’t normally begin a new book with a conjunction, especially the conjunction “And”.  Instead of beginning the Parsha and the Book of Shmot with Eilah (These), the Parsha begins with V’Eilah (And these). Also, we know, based upon the conclusion of Sefer Breishit that the sons, along with Jacob, arrived in Egypt decades before (Gen. 46:8-30). Why do these opening verses repeat the concluding verses of the previous book? RaMBaN, (the great 12th-century Spanish doctor, commentator, and Halachist), and R’ Bachya (late 13th and early 14th-century Torah commentator), explain that the conjunction which begins the Parsha purposefully connects this new book to the previous book.  “B’nai Yisroel”, the term now used for the extended tribe owe their existence and their future existence to V’Eilah –“and these”…. these sons of Jacob, these sons who were “with Jacob” in his descent into Egypt. Rabbi Samson Raphael Hirsh (19th Cent. Germany) explains that these twelve sons and their resulting twelve tribal families were intimately attached to Jacob, and this was the secret of Israel’s strength and survival in Egypt. Although each son had his own family, he remained connected and united with Jacob. Implicit to these opening verses we understand that the secret to B’nai Israel’s survival in Egypt as slaves: past, present, and future were connected through values and covenant of the name of Jacobs's twelve sons, Jacob, and his father and grandfather, Isaac and Abraham. The strength of those connections, the strength of being connected to the past with an eye towards a hopeful and positive future kept B’nai Israel spiritually free despite physical hardship and bondage.

          A name isn’t just a name. The names of Yaakov’s sons were so much more than names. They were the names of 12 tribes. Each tribe embodied a brand, an essence of some kind. Levi would come to embody the tribe of the priesthood. Levi would be the tribe that came to be known as always in service to God. So doesn’t it make sense that Moshe, the greatest of God’s servants came from the Tribe of Levi? So what does it say about a political party that won’t disavow a person who lied about everything that contributes to who he is? Yes, there is a name, but we don’t know who he really is. What we do know is the presence of such a person diminishes a Party that believes in nothing but power. The presence of such a person diminishes our trust in democratic institutions.  

Peace
Rav Yitz    

Tuesday, January 3, 2023

If Mercy's In Business, I Wish It For Your (Robert Hunter & Mickey Hart- "Fire On The Mountain")

           With my wife visiting our son in Israel during the Christmas and New Year’s vacation, I decided to pay a visit to my parents. During dinner with my parents, they both became incredibly serious. It was the kind of serious where I was awaiting for one of them to tell me some dreadful news. Apparently, they had the same talk with my younger sister last week.  Thankfully, the news wasn’t dreadful but the subject matter was rather troubling. My parents have aged a lot and I think the fact that they both had Covid this past summer has given them a powerful concern about their own mortality. So, during dinner, my parents expressed their concerns about aging, their own health, and their anticipated deterioration of health. Both talked about their desire to remain in their home for as long as they were physically and mentally capable. Both shared their concerns regarding what “measures” to take during the coming years if, in fact, health deteriorates rapidly. They both understood that in the coming years, my sister and I would be much more involved in making decisions for them or with them, decisions that will affect them. They were anxious, nervous, and needed peace of mind as they head into their very golden years together. So I listened, I smiled and I told them that my sister and I will do everything we can to respect their wishes. 

             This morning we read from Parsha Vayechi. This is the final Parsha in the book of Breishit. T Parsha begins with Yaakov calling Yosef and making him swear an oath that he will not be buried in Egypt. He also blesses his grandsons Ephraim and Menashe. He gathers his sons together and offers each son a blessing or a prophecy. Yaakov dies and his sons take him out of Egypt and fulfill their vow. They bury their father in Heron alongside Avraham and Yitzchak and Sarah Rebecca and Leah. Afterward, the brothers fear that Yosef will finally take vengeance for their mistreatment of him. Yosef doesn’t, and the brothers and their families continue to grow and prosper in Goshen. As Yosef prepares for his death, he makes his brother's vow to take his bones out of Egypt and bury his bones in Eretz Canaan. 

Yaakov’s final wish is to be buried in Canaan, in the Caves of the Machpela with his ancestors, Avraham/Sarah, Yitzchak/Rivka, and his wife Leah. Yaakov shares this wish with Yosef. Given his position within Egypt, Yosef would be the most likely of the sons who could arrange to fulfill Yaakov’s wish. After sharing his final wish with his beloved son Yosef; Yaakov asks Yosef to swear to him that he will carry out this final wish. To demonstrate one’s “swearing a vow,” Yaakov tells Yosef: Im Nah Matzati Chein M’Einecha If now I have found grace in your eyes Sim Nah Yadcha Tachat Yereichi put, I pray of you, your hand beneath my thigh v’Asita Imadi Chesed v’Emet –, and deal kindly and truthfully with me. However, Yosef does not do as his father asks; Yosef does not put his hand beneath his father’s thigh as an indication of swearing an oath. Rather, Vayomer [Yosef] said, Anochi Eseh ChidvarechaI personally will do as you said. Yaakov, sensing his son’s hesitation, asks Yosef to swear that he will fulfill the request. Finally, Yosef acquiesces and swears an oath to fulfill his father’s request.

          Why does Yosef hesitate? The text clearly conveys that Yosef did not make a “vow” to Yaakov when first asked. Yosef did not immediately put his hand beneath his father’s thigh as an indication of making a vow.  Yosef did not immediately say “I swear to bury you with your ancestors”.  Why doesn’t Yaakov’s favorite son, Joseph,  swear this last dying favor to his father? What kind of son doesn’t swear an oath if asked by his dying father to do so if it means peace of mind and a soul at peace for his father?  Yosef’s first answer indicates that he will look after the request personally. Midrash explains the difference between Avraham’s servant’s behavior and Yosef’s behavior: HaEved Asa K’Avadoto Uven Chorin Asah K’Chiruto – Rabbi Yitzchak said: The servant acted like a servant and the free man acted as a free man, The servant acted like a servant, as it says ‘And the servant put his hand beneath his [Avraham’s] thigh; While the freeman acted as a free person: ‘And he said, I will do as you said’’ As a free individual, Yosef is only bound by his conscience. He is free to question. The servant, on the other hand, has no such ability. He is bound to fulfill his obligations whether forced or unforced. The Malbim, the 17th-century commentator explains that Yosef was acting as a son should. Yosef was trying to act out of filial responsibility, based upon his own free will rather than a servant who is bound by oaths. 

          There are moments when one’s own volition is not enough to fulfill a final wish. Yaakov makes Yosef swear the oath because he wants Yosef to acknowledge an authority greater than his own. He also wants Yosef to acknowledge an authority greater than Pharaoh. Yaakov wanted Yosef to be completely powerless and act solely on behalf of his father. Under normal circumstances, according to ChaZaL – our Talmudic sages of Blessed Memory, the acceptance of the Torah and its commandments are an acknowledgment and acceptance of an external authority greater than ourselves. Intrinsic to that acceptance is a humbling awareness that we are not all that powerful or in control of every aspect of life.  Of course, my sister and I will do everything we can to respect our parents' wishes as they enter these upcoming years.  As my parents spoke to me, and I listened, I only had one thought. After all the sacrifices my parents have made in helping me to become the best possible version of me, how could I not honor their request and do everything I can to make their golden years together as golden and as dignified as possible?  

Peace,
Rav Yitz