Well, the kids finally returned to school. After taking a vacation with my children, I admit it. I am glad they are back in school. While we were away, there was one truly bad day. During the course of this one day, each child melted down. Each child could not be reasoned with. While the storm that consumed each of my children varied in length, it was the last melt down that was the most painful. No matter what I said, there was an obnoxious comment. Not only was she going to have the last word but she her last words were utterly unreasonable. I looked over at my wife and said that I needed to take a walk. I left her there with my rebellious child. As I walked, looking up at the stars I thought about the laws of the Rebellious Son.
This Shabbat, we read Parsha Ki Teitzeh. Moshe teaches us the laws concerning war, creating an environment for soldiers to behave as honorably as possible. We learn that everyone, whether “loved” or “hated” has rights under the law as well as entitlements. We learn that every one of us is responsible for the other. If we see something that has been lost by our neighbor then we pick it up and return it. Moshe re-iterates that human relationships can either be holy, between a husband and wife, and between parents and children or unholy by crossing the boundaries of those relationships. Moshe reminds the people that children will not be punished for the sins of their parents, nor will parents be punished as a result of their children. In such a situation there would be no need to add punishment since the parents of the child or the children of the parent would be punished enough just having been touch by the situation. Essentially this morning’s Parsha is all about human relationships designed to maintain individual holiness as well as communal holiness.
So it is troubling that we are confronted with one of the most controversial commandments of the Torah. Ki Yiheyeh L’Ish Bein Sorer U’Moreh Einenu Shomeiah B’kol Aviv U’vkol Imo, If a man will have a wayward and rebellious son, who does not hearken to the voice of his father and the voice of his mother V’Yisru Oto v’Lo Yishmah Aleihem and they discipline him, but he does not hearken to them, then his father and mother shall grasp him and take him out to the elders of his city and the gate of his place. They shall say to the elders of the city, B’Neinu zeh Sorer U Moreh “This son of ours is wayward and rebellious, he does not hearken to our voice; he is a glutton and a drunkard.” All the men of his city shall pelt him with stones and he shall die; U’viarta HaRah Mikirbecha and you shall remove the evil from your midst (Deut. 21:18-21). The literal meaning of the verses suggests that in the extreme case of an evil child who is beyond help, and clings to evil the way the rest of the community clings to holiness, such a child must be eliminated.
First we should all recognize the fact that Moshe’s presentation of the “Rebellious Child” is theoretical. The Talmud makes the point that “there never was nor will there ever be” a child to be put to death based upon this law. Second, we should recognize the fact that Moshe could be presenting the "Rebellious Child" as hypothetical. Rashi, the 11th century Northern French commentator, explains that the harshness of the punishment is not for crimes already perpetrated rather it is to prevent this amoral, evil person to grow up and wreak greater havoc upon society. Rather than allowing him to die as an older person with his victims’ blood on his hands, Moshe teaches us to eliminate this person before there are more victims. Theoretically Rashi is merely stating what so many of us already take for granted in terms of our place within society. The greater good is the highest virtue.
As we approach Rosh Hashanah, and we begin evaluating ourselves, we can take a lesson from this theoretical case. The death of such rebellious person is a result of not mending one’s ways, of not engaging in T’shuvah. Such a person’s soul is already dead, or at least that is what the Torah is symbolically telling us. So let us have the strength and courage to make sure that we never allow ourselves to slip that far and in doing so, the rebellious child that resides within in us can grow and evolve into a mentsche. As I returned to the house, my “rebellious child” greeted me. She apologized. She hugged me and truly sought forgiveness.
Peace,
Rav Yitz
No comments:
Post a Comment