There are moments I catch myself as a parent, saying things my parents said or doing things my parents did. Sometimes these moments are a result of an instinctive behavior, expression or gesture that I never gave any thought about. Sometimes these moments are a result of a strategic decision based upon my own personal experience as a child dealing with my parents. Sometimes these moments arise because I am reminded of advice that was offered to me decades ago. A few days ago when speaking to one of my daughters I had that moment. I saw myself as my father. As I responded, I was reminded of a piece of sage advice offered to me. "Let children make decisions, but don’t let a child make a teen-age decision, don’t let a teenager make an adult decision, don’t let young adult make a decision that a 60 year should make." So as my father’s advice streamed across my mind I now had to think of a creative deal for my daughter. I thought of the old television game show “Let’s Make a Deal”. The studio audience would dress up in ridiculous costumes hoping to be a contestant. Then the host, Monty Hall, would make a proposition. The contestant could take the amount of cash in Monty Hall’s pocket or behind door number 1 or 2 or 3. During the course of the conversation he would make the choice more difficult by telling the contestant how much money was in the pocket. Now the contestant would have enough information to know what he/she stood to gain or lose with the ensuing decision. Some took the cash; some took what was behind the door. It was interesting to watch the contestant’s reaction when he/she finds out what was behind the door, what could have been won or what was lost.
This Shabbat we read from Parsha Re'eh. Moshe re-iterates numerous commandments both positive and negative. Moshe reminds B'nai Yisroel of the obligation to observe the Shalosh Regalim (the Pilgrimage Festivals: Pesach, Shavuot, Sukkot), the laws concerning Jewish servants/bondsman, providing charity to the less fortunate and the cancellation of loans in the 7th year of the 7 year business cycle. Moshe reminds us of the foods we can and cannot eat. Moshe also reminds us to be wary of family and friends that try to convince to stray from these obligations, as well as following false prophets, and behaving like the neighboring tribes such as the Canaanites, as well as a myriad of other commandments and warnings.
Certainly Moshe issues many warnings, and lists many mitzvot. However, instead of issuing these commandments “from on High”, Moshe teaches these commandments and offers warnings. Rather than the unilateral legislation of these commandments, Moshe provides this generation with a choice. Moshe wants this generation to make a responsible informed decision for which they will be held responsible. Moshe tells B’nai Yisroel what lies behind doors number one and two. Et HaBracha Asher Tishma’u El Mitzvot Adoshem Elokeichem Asher Anochi M’tzaveh Etchem Ha’Yom – The blessing: that you obey the commandments of Hashem, Your God, that I command you today. V’Haklalah Im Lo Tishme’u El Mitzvot Adoshem Elokeichemt V’Sartem Min HaDerech Asher Anochi M’Tzaveh Etchem Ha’Yom LaLechet Acharei Elohim Acheirim Asher Lo Y’Datem –And the curse; if you do not obey the commandments of Hashem, Your God, and you stray from the path that I command you today, to follow gods of other people that you did not know. (Deut. 11:27-28). It is interesting to note that Moshe did not tell us our reward or our blessing. Likewise, Moshe did not tell us the curse. Rather he defined the blessing and the curse. A blessing is tantamount to obeying and observing the Mitzvot, and a curse is tantamount to disregarding the commandments and following other gods instead.
In a sense this is the ultimate game of Lets Make a Deal. Moshe perspective is clear. He doesn’t really need to tell us the specific contents behind door number one neither does he need to tell us the specific contents behind door number two. Intrinsic to obedience and observance is a blessing. Intrinsic to disobedience and going wayward is a curse. Intrinsic to every commandment and every mitzvah is the expression of our relationship with God. Moshe reminds us: “ Ki Am Kadosh – For you are a Holy Nation” (Deut. 14:2). Therefore everything we do should be an expression of our desire to be near God. Observance draws us closer to God. Being close to God is a blessing. Disobedience pushes us away from God. Being far from God is a curse. By presenting the mitzvot in this fashion, Moshe accomplishes several important goals. First, Moshe empowers B’nai Yisroel. They can now make an informed decision regarding obedience or disobedience because they understand the consequences to both. Second Moshe speaks to B’nai Yisroel as if they were a mature nation instead of children. We are offered a choice. We are presented the opportunity to take responsibility for our choices. This is the difference between the slavery and freedom. The generation born in freedom must be able to take responsibility for its choices or it might as well remain enslaved.
So I sat down with my daughter and gave her a choice. I told her what was behind door number one and two. I explained that whatever she decided was her decision and she was responsible for it. I told her I loved her however that has absolutely nothing do with what is behind door number one or two. We all have the opportunity to make decisions about our lives however the key is whether we take responsibility for our lives. We should always be aware of our own blessings and our curses. However if we knew that behind door number one , the door with the blessings, exists holiness and meaning in our lives we would always choose wisely. More than the blessing of holiness and meaning behind door number one, there is more. Behind door number one, behind the blessing is God. We only need the strength and the wisdom to choose the blessing of Torah, to have holiness, meaning, and God in our lives.
Peace,
Rav Yitz
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