Clergymen in Uniform (Bob Dylan - "When I Paint My Master Piece")

One of the great ongoing battles in our household pits me and my wife against our children. The battle involves clothes, namely their children’s clothes. This battle will flare up in a store or a mall where the child wishes to acquire clothes. Lately the conflict erupts into a large-scale conflagration on a Shabbat morning when children begin complaining that they don’t have anything to wear. Our cold war will become a hot war when our daughter needs to get dressed for a Bat Mitzvah party and she doesn’t like the choices available to her. Thankfully, we don’t have this fight during school since everyone must wear a uniform. So five days a week my wife and I just prepare the next heated fight about clothes; knowing full well that the fight will eventually occur. Like all parents, we understand that as our children become teenagers and get dressed on their own, the clothing conflagrations will be epic in scale; a battle between the parents and the decline of morality within the western world. The fact of the matter is we have uniforms for everything. Every profession, various religious groups, and ethnic groups have uniforms. Even school children where no formal uniforms exist have uniforms. When I was in high school the preppy kids wore khakis and oxford shirts, the punks wore torn T-shirts, army boots, and multicolored hair, the ROTC kids wore a lot of army fatigues, and on game days the jocks wore a dress shirt and tie.

This Shabbat, we read from Parshah Tetzaveh, and in it we learn about the uniform of the Kohen Gadol, the High Priest. Just like last week’s Parshah was a series of instructions on the way in which a physical space becomes beautified and holy, Parshah Tetzaveh offers a series of instructions on the way in which a certain individual’s physical appearance is beautified, and glorious. From head to toe, we are told that each item of the Kohen Gadol’s priestly uniform is made of fine linen, valuable stones, gold, cotton silk turquoise wool to name just a few of the ingredients. Certainly we could understand the Parshah from a superficial perspective but to do so would be to misunderstand a deeper and perhaps more powerful message. We live in a society where “clothes make the man”, clothes define who and what we are. However Parshah Tetzaveh is teaches us something radically different. Instead of clothing making us look sharper, slimmer, better proportioned, what if clothes could express our intelligence, our emotional health, our sense of decency, the holiness that exists within our soul and the degree to which that holiness is expressed. What would such clothes look like? Such clothes would have to express the degree to which we have permitted God into our lives. Such clothes would have to express the holy magnificence of God’s presence within our lives.

The Torah is very clear as to the reason for such highly decorative, highly ornate clothing. V’Kidashti et Ohel Mo’Ed v’Et Ha’Mizbeach V’Et Aharon v’Et Banav Akadesh L’Chahen Li – I shall sanctify the Tent of Meeting and the Altar; and Aaron and his sons shall I sanctify to minister to Me V’Shachanti B’Toch Bnai Yisroel V’Hayiti Lahem L’Elohim I shall rest My Presence among the Children of Israel , and I shall be their God (Ex. 29:44-45). God’s presence will make the Tent of the Meeting holy. In other words, God’s presence will make a particular space holy. Rabbi Ovadiah Sforno (15/16^th Century Italy) explains that God rests among us in order to accept with favor our prayers and service. However, God resting his Presence is not enough. The Kohanim and ultimately the rest of us need to recognize that this is our God and we need to act appropriately. We can never take God’s proximity for granted. Therefore Aaron and his son’s, serving on behalf of the people, must achieve a higher degree of holiness compared to the rest of the people. This higher level of holiness must exist both inside and outside. Any inconsistency renders the Kohen Gadol impure. If the clothes become physically dirty, then he is momentarily impure. If his heart wanders, if his mind is elsewhere, or if he has not completely given of himself to the service to God on our behalf, then he is momentarily impure as well.

Shabbat becomes a day in which our outside, the clothes we wear to shul (synagogue), match our inside, the selfless process of prayer and learning. Just like we cover ourselves in nice clothing, we cover our souls in the very beautiful and ornate vestments of prayer and study. Shabbat is the day when our physical world seamlessly fits in with the spiritual world. Even in the course of a regular day, we have the opportunity through prayer, Kashrut, study, and Gemilut Chasadim for our internal “clothing” to match our external clothing. Maybe if we explain that to children, then they will learn that clothes don’t make the person, but the person makes the clothes. In the meantime, if only we can get the kids dressed on Shabbat morning or for the next Bar/Bat Mitzvah without conflict, everything would be so much simpler!

Peace,

Rav Yitz

You Get So Far Away From How It Feels Inside (Robert Hunter& Jerry Garcia - "Comes a Time")

One of the more fascinating aspects of parenthood is the parent-teacher conference. For about 90% of the time they are all quite mundane and very repetitive. The teachers speak nuanced complement. “She is very social,” does not mean she has lots of friends. Rather it means that she talks a lot. “He is very creative” does not mean that he will write a then next great spy-thriller. Instead it means that he struggles to focus upon the mundane tasks that have been assigned. So, after we get past all the double-speak, the curriculum, and perhaps any concerns my wife and I may have; we ask the teacher about our children in terms of behavior. Do they listen? Do they answer back? Are they respectful? Are they put forth an effort in the classroom? Do they get along with the other children? Do they bully any one? Do they demonstrate empathy to the kid who is always being left out? When the teachers begin answering these questions, I always begin incredulously smiling. Certainly, I am proud to hear such positive answers to these questions. They listen? Even after the first request? I can’t believe it? They don’t answer back? “Unbelievable” I say to myself and the incredulous smile begins. They act respectfully? “My kids? Go figure,” I say to myself, and my smile spreads. “They get along with other children? Amazing, the teacher should have heard them fighting this morning”, I say to myself. My response contains none of these sarcastic thoughts, or the utter surprise that I feel. Rather I look at the teacher and ask if there was a way to take 2% of these “wonderful children” and give her 2% of the typical children that are in my home. I figure that we would then have a little more of the “sweet terrific” kids that they are in school, and less of the other stuff which they seem to save for me and my wife! My wife reminds me that as long as they are terrific in public, home is where they can “let their hair down”. Soothingly she reminds me that as they grow up, eventually there will be more consistency between how terrific they are in public and private. We just have to get through adolescence.

This Shabbat, we read from Parsha Terumah. In it, Moshe has re-ascended the mountain in order to receive the laws, and the blueprint, if you will, for the construction of the Mishkan, the portable tabernacle that will eventually permit B’nai Yisroel to gather, to make offerings to God and to provide a physical dwelling for God. If you are an architect, or if you are an interior decorator, this Parsha goes into tremendous detail about Mishkan’s construction and decoration. Before all the detail are presented for construction and decoration, God commands Moshe to tell B’nai Yisroel that the funding for this vital public works project will come from each individual V’Yikchu Li Terumah Mei’eit Kol Ish Asher Yidvenu Libo Tikechu et Terumati – They shall take for me a portion, from every man whose heart motivates him, you shall take my portion (Ex. 25:2). The holiest spot within the community, the most sacred area is based upon each and every individual apportioning a percentage of their assets to the construction of, decoration of, and maintenance of the Mishkan. How incredibly equitable! Everyone is involved and everyone has a stake in the outcome.

There were no “dues” per se. Rather each individual had to look within him/herself and be brutally honest. Each individual would give as they saw fit. This was a sacred moment between the individual and God. The object was not to give due to social pressure but rather for the holiest of reasons. However such a process requires tremendous honesty. Such a process requires us to be sure that our outside matches our inside. Such a process forces the individual to “mean what you say and say what you mean”. Such a process forces the individual to not only “talk the talk” but walk the walk”. This message is subliminally hinted at when we read about the design of the Aron, the Ark that is to hold the Shnei Luchot Ha’Brit – the Two Stone Tablets upon which are written the Ten Commandments. V’Asu Aron Atzei Shitim – they shall make an Ark of acacia wood (Ex.25:10). V’Tzipitah Oto Zahav tahor Mibayit U’Michutz T’Tzapenu V’Asita Alav Zeir Zahav Saviv – You shall cover it with pure gold, from within and from without shall you cover it, and you shall make on it a gold crown all around (Ex. 25:11). It makes sense that the outside of the Ark is covered with gold since that will be viewed by the people. However what is the reason for lining the arc with pure gold from the inside? Rabeinu Chananel, the 11^th century North African Talmudist, comments that this arrangement symbolized the Talmudic dictum that a Torah scholar must be consistent; his inner character must match his public demeanor, his actions must conform to his professed beliefs. However there is no reason to limit such sentiment to Torah scholars. Kol Ish Asher Yidvenuy Libo Tikechu et Terumati – every man whose heart motivates him you shall take my portion. Every man should be motivated to be consistent. Every person’s actions should conform to his/her professed beliefs, and his or her beliefs should be expressed by behavior.

Everyday, we have an opportunity to be consistent to our beliefs and our values. Everyday we have an opportunity to demonstrate to our children that our behavior matches our beliefs and values. Everyday we face the struggle to keep the pure gold that exists within our insides the same as the pure gold that exists on the outside. The object is to never tarnish that which lies within nor that which lies with out. So every opportunity we have to express holiness, whether Mitzvot l’Ben Adam L’Chavero – Mitzvot that pertains between people or Mitzvot L’Hashem – Mitzvot that pertain to God, must be taken advantage of. For in our neglect to do so, we tarnish the most precious aspect, our souls’ purity and holiness.

Peace,

Rav Yitz

Every Day You Got To Pay (John Barlow & Bob Weir "Lost Sailor")

Sundays in our house are hardly a relaxing part of the weekend. In some ways, it is busier, involves much more coordination of schedules and is rather hectic. For our children, Sunday is potentially a great day. No Shabbat restrictions and no school means that our children go out of their way to cram as many things into Sunday as possible. No Shabbat restrictions and no School means that our children try to make Sunday the extraordinarily fun and exciting day. Of course this attitude is totally at odds with the parents who would prefer a relaxing and leisurely sort of day. Well needless to say, our children invariably carry the day. This past Sunday was typical of the “Sunday has to be the most exciting and extraordinary day” attitude. Our 6^th grade daughter was invited to a Bat Mitzvah party. My wife and I were invited but as an aveil (a mourner) my wife could not attend, so I went with our daughter. In the mean time, my wife took our 4^th grader to a social function at her school and dropped off our 2^nd grade son at the first of two birthday parties. After running a few errands our son was picked up and then dropped off at the next party. By then the Bat Mitzvah Party concluded and I took our daughter home. I then went back to the school and picked up our other daughter whose program just ended. After re-convening at the house for a few moments, my wife and our two daughters had to run to the store, (for what – I do not know). I went to pick up our son from his second birthday party. He and I went to minyan and then we all finally caught up with each other at dinner. Of course, none of our children were hungry, having stuffed themselves with pizza candy and ice cream all day. After dinner they happily showered and went to bed. Exhausted and with stomachs hurting each child said the same thing to me as I kissed them goodnight. Each child was actually happy that this “exciting, extraordinary day” was over and they were happy to return to their everyday schedule. My wife and I agreed. Thankful that Sunday was finally ending we were only too happy to return to the comfort of everyday life.

Last week we read about the revelation at Sinai, with the thunder, the lightening, and a big booming voice. Last week we read the Aseret Dibrot, the Ten Commandments. Last week we were inspired by the words “I am the lord your god, you should have no other gods before me” “you shall keep the Sabbath holy”, respect your parents, and so on and so on. Of course these commandments are the bedrock of Judeo- Christian morality and society. However when the thunder and lightning are finished, and the big booming voice stops booming, B’nai Yisroel has Ten Commandments. However they still had a problem. They told Moshe to return to the mountain but they never acknowledged their acceptance of the Ten Commandments. We can almost imagine Bnai Yisroel so awestruck that they couldn’t muster an answer. After all, seeing a mountain on fire, the thunder, the lightning and a big booming voice, does not exactly lend itself to people nodding their head in understanding and approval. The moment was so awesome, so inspiring, that it utterly paralyzed Bnai Yisroel. Even the commandments themselves were so awe inspiring that Bnai Yisroel has no way to deal with the day to day issues of everyday life.

However, B’nai Yisroel, like the rest of us, could not and cannot live life in a state of revelation, awe and unable to function in the everyday world. As human beings, our ability to stay that awe-inspired, can only last a brief moment before we understand that we live here on earth and not in the spiritual realm. Now Bnai Yisroel had to learn how to behave like a nation of priests here, on an everyday basis. This week’s Parshah, Mishpatim, begins: V’Eilah Hamishpatim, And these are the judgments or laws that you [Moshe], shall put before them. God then lists a plethora of rules and regulations by which everyday life must be lived. The list enumerates how to solve problems that occur between community members: the treatment strangers and slaves and how to be a mentsche. Except for attorneys, this list of laws and statutes might seem incredibly uninspiring, dry, and non-spiritual.

Even in the dry, seemingly uninspired promulgation of these everyday laws, we learn a very valuable lesson. Parsha Mishpatim, with its plethora of laws and statutes provide us with the tools for everyday life. We know how to take the mundane and add meaning and holiness to it. Torah gives us the tools. We learn that revelation doesn’t happen too often. Grand, powerful, awe inspiring events don’t happen every day. If such moments did occur every day then those moments would cease being so grand, so powerful and so awe-inspiring. Certainly, each day can often run into another day without hearing a big booming voice, without fire without lightening or a smoking mountain. Every day can become quite mundane and routine. Judaism is not confined to one revelation, which only occurred at Sinai. We are capable of experiencing revelation everyday; it just won’t be the “Ten Commandments” type of revelation. Parshah Mishpatim tells how to do this. Every day, in our relationships with fellow human being, God, and ourselves; we have an opportunity to behave in a holy and mentschlekite manner.

Despite the mundane and dry presentation of these rules, Bnai Yisroel’s response is completely inspired. The response seems more appropriate to the inspired moments of the Ten Commandments. However by responding to the humdrum laws that govern everyday life, with the words Na’Aseh V’Nishmah We will do and we will learn, we learn a powerful lesson about the awe inspired moment of the Ten Commandments and the mundane aspects of daily life and everyday relationships. Bnai Yisroel’s answer suggests that we are capable of inspiring ourselves, by finding revelation, by experiencing revelation even in the mundane aspects of life, in learning, in struggling to combine the sacred and the profane and the holy and the mundane. By doing, by behaving, by treating other like a mentshe, by observing the mundane mitzvot of relationships we make it part of our lives then we can learn about it. It is only when we come down off the mountain, break down our walls, enter into the inner sanctum, and make the secular world fit into our observance that Judaism thrives. Torah and Mitzvot are approachable and accessible. It has come down from off the mountain. It has to be part of everyday life.

Peace,

Rav Yitz

My Life Needs Some Correction, Alteration in Direction (Ron "Pigpen" McKernan - "The Stranger/Two Souls in Communion")

As a father and a husband nothing causes me more pain than when I see my family experience turmoil. When I see my children become so frustrated with homework or overwhelmed by the stress of looking for a first job, I counsel them to do something else, something that empowers them. When I see my wife get overwhelmed by schedules, and all the things that mom’s get stressed about, I listen and focus upon something that offers her a sense of control. Whether it is to tell my oldest daughter to go work out, take a walk, focus upon something else or instructing my younger kids to take a shower or practice piano, and suggest to my wife to walk away from the stressor for a little while or take a break reminding her that it will still be around later; the point is to provide them with tools to manage the sense that they have no control. While these are just the typical types of turmoil and stress that is typical of a family, we probably know people whose lives always seem to be in a perpetual state of stress, anxiety, and turmoil. We have all known people who never seem content in their lives. That is not to say that such a person suffers from depression, or that such a person is a pessimist. Rather, it seems that something is missing from the person’s soul. That is to say the individual’s soul is incomplete. Maybe the lack of completeness is the result of a catastrophic loss such as a family member. Maybe dysfunctional behavior is a result of a lack of completeness or perceived incompleteness. Usually such a person appears on Dr. Phil and other self help talk shows. Usually the “malady” is a result of the soul as opposed to the body.

This week's Parsha is Yitro. Named after Moshe father in-law, who happens to be a Midyanite priest, the Parsha begins with Moshe leading B'nai Yisroel toward the wilderness of Midyan where he meets up with his father in-law, his wife and his two sons. Yitro suggests that Moshe should create a bureaucracy whereby others administer the small everyday rulings required of a judge. Difficult legal issues would be administered by Moshe. Moshe is then commanded by God to bring B'nai Yisroel to Har Sinai. For three days they will purify themselves, clean their clothes, not have marital relations, and purify their souls for a revelation. There with the mountain smoking and thunder billowing from the heavens, God begins to speak. B'nai Yisroel is absolutely petrified and fearing death, they beg Moshe to go up the mountain as their Shaliach (appointed messenger). Moshe ascends the mountain and receives the Aseret HaDibrot (the Ten Commandments), then descends. Upon his descent he tells B'nai Yisroel the Aseret HaDibrot. The Parsha concludes with B'nai Yisroel readily accepting the Ten Commandments, Moshe re-assures the people not to fear the thunder and the flames, God attests to the fact that B'nai Yisroel has accepted these commandments and then commands Moshe to build and altar of earth.

The Ten Commandments are bound by several themes. The first five commandments are God oriented. The second five commandments are people oriented. Violation of The Aseret HaDibrot is punishable by death. Through our modern perspective, we may not agree but we can understand the concept of capital punishment in terms of murder, testifying falsely, (in which false testimony leads to death), or even kidnapping. However how do we explain capital punishment as a punishment for not honoring your parents, keeping the Shabbat or committing Avodah Zarah (Idolatry)? Certainly violating Shabbat or violating the first five commandments that are all God oriented does not necessarily hurt someone else. Even not honoring ones parents might not warrant capital punishment in today's day and age. So how do we understand that each commandment is punishable by death?

We know that if we do not take care of our bodies, there is a chance our bodies will be hurt. If we don't eat right, get enough sleep, and exercise then our resistance is low and there is a chance we will get sick. If we don't fasten our seatbelts then there is a chance that we won't be able to walk away from an accident. If we drink too much and too often or if we smoke, we know that we are doing damage to our body. As human beings, we also have a soul. Just like we know to do things that help our physical existence, there are things that we do to help our spiritual existence. Failure to take care of our souls is also detrimental to our existence. Failure to take care of our souls leads to emptiness, purposelessness and a misguided existence. The first five commandments are about the welfare of our souls. The first five commandments give us a sense of purpose for own existence. The first five commandments fill our lives with meaning even when overwhelmed with the onslaught of the humdrum of everyday life. The first five commandments give us a sense of where we fit in the universe. The first five commandments are for each individual's soul and the soul's relationship to God.

In a sense, our own ignorance, our own anxieties, our own insecurities, our lack of purpose and our lack of focus imprison us. The Aseret HaDibrot offers us a means to transcend that which imprisons us. We are provided a blueprint to live a life that is part of a community (the second five commandments) and accounts for our own sense of self worth and purpose (the first five commandments). The Aseret HaDibrot teaches us, and commands to transcend time and space by adding meaning and holiness to our lives. The Aseret HaDibrot teaches us that our spiritual well being is just as important as our physical well being. When our soul is complete, filled with a sense of purpose, filled with love, and filled with the acknowledgment that there is God, we are able to transcend the physical. Maybe the time has come for us to acknowledge and accept that our souls must occupy the same priority as our bodies. Maybe the time has come for us to strike that balance between the physical and the spiritual. Perhaps the key to a life with minimal stress and turmoil, or feeling a lack of control and instead achieving a meaningful life is based upon living in accordance with a code that is the foundation to the perfect balance between the physical and the spiritual.