All Your Life, You Were Only Waiting For This Moment To Be Free (John Lennon & Paul McCartney- "Blackbird")

We have schlepped boxes from the basement to the kitchen. We have emptied our pantry of all the Chametz (all the “non-kosher for Pesach” foods and platters. We have filled the pantry with our Kosher for Pesach dishes, and cooking utensils. We set up a shelving unit to hold the kosher for Pesach food. We have closed up cabinets and drawers that hold our regular year-round kitchen stuff.  We have carried out our Chametz and “disowned” it.  Our children have finally cleaned up their rooms (some of the things they found was truly incredible). We made numerous trips to the supermarket, so much so, that I have my own reserved parking spot. We have cleaned the kitchen over and over and over again. My poor mother-in-law thought she was coming to just visit her daughter and grandchildren had been put to work by my wife. Of course, there is the yearly discussion of the menu: the Chef wants to make different dishes as she has grown bored making the same foods year in and year out. However, those of us who work as the sous chefs and actually eat the food yearn for the comfort of the same seasonal holiday foods that gets served every year.  The kitchen is about 15 degrees warmer than the rest of the house because it seems that the oven has been on all week. Yes, the Pesach preparations seem never-ending. Discussions and arguments about what is and is not Kosher for Passover and which Rabbi supports a lenient or a strict interpretation occurs constantly.   Indeed it seems very easy to get bogged down in the minutiae and the detail that we forget the purpose of this slave-like labor and preparation. 

This Shabbat marks the first day of Pesach, Zman Cheiruteinu – the Time of our Freedom, as well as being Shabbat, Yom Menucha, and a Day of Rest.  Because Pesach comes once a year and Shabbat occurs fifty-two time a year, on this particular Shabbat, Pesach tends to be our focus. We didn’t just partake of a Shabbat dinner; we participated in a Seder.  We don’t read from the weekly Torah reading, we read a special Torah reading that focuses upon the narrative of the first Passover celebration in Egypt as B’nai Yisroel was about to become a free people and leave Egypt. U’Lekachetem Agudat Eizov Utvaltem BaDam Asher BaSaf V’HiGaTem El HaMaSHKoF V’El SHTei HaMZuZoT MiN HaDaM Asher BaSaF V’ATeM Lo TeiTZu ISh MiPeTaCH BeiTo Ad  BoKeR -  You Shall take a bundle of hyssop and dip it into the blood that is in the basin, and touch the lintel and the two doorposts with some of the blood that is in the basin and as for you, you shall not leave the entrance of the house until morning (Ex. 12:22). At some point during that tension-filled night, B’nei Yisroel would be freed. What was the exact moment of their freedom? What minute, what hour in the night were these slaves finally freed? The text does not tell us. The text only tells us that by morning the slaves would be freed from slavery but obligated to retell the story to each generation.

                So we are obligated to tell this story to each generation. What is more, we are commanded to see ourselves as if we were actually slaves in Egypt and freed that night. Yet all we can say is that we were freed at some point during the night. At what exact time who can say? Yet each week we know exactly what time we stop. We know exactly what time we light Shabbat or Yom Tov (Festival) candles in order to usher in the Sabbath and the Chag (Festival). We know exactly when these moments begin and when these moments conclude.  Needless to say, when my son and I are sitting in Shul on Friday night, ushering in both the Sabbath and the Festival of Pesach, we will emit a large cleansing breath, knowing that our preparations are finished, and our work leading up to Zman Cheiruteinu, the Time of Our Freedom, is complete ( or as complete as it can be). I know that when my son and I walk into our home, and the Seder Table is set, the candles are glowing and my wife, daughters, and mother in law are sitting quietly for just a moment catching their collective breaths, that they are aware of this powerful moment, a moment where Shabbat and Pesach has conflated into the deepest possible understanding of what freedom is. Tt this moment, the final boxes have been put away, the preparation finished, the meal is cooked and we can now partake of freedom. Yes, we are free to sit, free to eat, drink. We are free to ask questions. We are free to offer answers. We are free to discuss and we are free to tell the story. Because we are free to do these seemingly trivial things: eat, drink, ask questions, answer, discuss, and tell stories; we understand and appreciate not only Pesach- Zman Cheiruteinu (Time of Our Freedom), but Shabbat- Yom Menucha (a Day of Rest) as well.

Peace and Chag Kasher V’Sameach,

Rav Yitz  

Talk About Your Plenty, Talk About Your Ills ( Robert Hunter, Jerry Garcia & Phil Lesh - "St. Stephen").

 One of the most fascinating aspects of the Pesach Seder is that educationally speaking, it provides a wonderful form of instruction. It utilizes props, food, stories of real live heroes, song, as well as mythical paradigms with whom we can all identify. The most famous of these paradigms are the Arbah Banim, the Four Sons, or the Four Children, The Chacham – The wise child, The Rashah, known as the Rebellious child, the Tam, the simple child, and Sheino Yodeah Lishol- the one who does not know how to ask. With four children, each year we can see how they begin to take on different aspects of each category. A question that our family has always struggled with is the answer offered to the Rebellious Child and the answer offered to the Child Who Does Not Know How To Ask.

The Rebellious child (the RaShAh) asks a question. The Haggadah answers using the same words as its answer to The One Who Does Not Know How to Ask (Sheino Yodeah Lishol).  The Rebellious Child asks Mah HaAVodah HaZot Lachem – What does this service mean to you?  The Haggadah’s answer is taken from The Book of Exodus 13:8: Ba’Avur Zeh Asah Hashem Li B’tzeiti Mimitzrayim- Because this is what Hashem did for me when I left Egypt. However prior to the answer the Haggadah issues the following instruction: V’Af Atah Hakhei et Shinav – We set his teeth on edge, V’Amor Lo, then recite to him. The words are not enough, the answer must be delivered with a certain tone. The tone offers context and provides a deeper meaning than just the words from Exodus 13:8. The reason is because when he asked what the service meant to you, he of course excluded himself so the answer we give to the Rashah should be exclusive. The words appear to exclude the Rebellious Child, the tone is exceedingly confrontational to the Rebellious Child. We are to literally “knock his teeth out” with our answer.

Our answer to Sheino Yodeah Lishol is a citation from the same verse Bavur zeh Asah Hashem Li B’tzeiti Mimitzrayim – because of what Hashem did for me. A superficial reading suggests that this answer alienates this child like the same answer alienates the Rebellious child. However the two answers of very different because the questions and the questioner are different. The Child That Doesn’t Know How To Ask, never asked the question. The Haggadah gave an answer to an inquisitive look.  We can understand the Four Children as symbols four developmental categories leading to adulthood. The Child That Doesn’t Know How To Ask is the baby. The Rebellious Child is the teenager or the young adult that is single and not yet settled down. We can also understand these four Children symbolically representing different types of Jews. In either case, The Child That Doesn’t Know How to Ask has no obligation, doesn’t understand the concept of Chiyuv (obligation), nor can be expected to observe anything since the child does not know what to do nor how to do it. The words that constitute our answer should be simple, straightforward, but our tone should be warm, inviting, supportive and demonstrating concern.

Regarding the RaShah, it is important that we have some perspective about the Rebellious Child. The RaShah does not embody complete evil. The word for pure un-adulterated Evil is  RaH, Reish Ayin.  The Shin, the middle letter in RaShah, according to Kabbala, is a “good” letter. The Shin is a representative of God, for example one of the names for God is El Shadai. The Shin is the letter that appears on the Mezuzah and on Tefillin. So, because of the Shin in the word Rashah, we know that there is some hope for this soul. There is Godliness within the Rebellious Child. The RaShah should not be infantilized. Intellectually, The Rebellious Child understands that he is rebelling against something. Therefore, the teenager, or the educated Jew that rebels against Judaism, understand the idea of Chiyuv, religious obligation, and the idea of Jewish peoplehood, of Jewish community and transmitting a tradition. The Haggadah’s answer is designed to break down the RaShah’s arrogant tone. The same energy used for disrupting and negatively influencing others to stray can be channeled for a positive purpose. The Haggadah’s answer is not only for the benefit of RaShah but for those that the RaShah could influence. Of the four children, the most impressionable is One Who Does Not Know How to Ask (Sheino Yodeah Lishol). Words don’t necessarily suffice. This child is influenced by action and by deed. As easily as this child is influence by the RaShah, he or she will be just as easily influenced by the way in which we respond to the RaShah. Therefore when the RaShah has his teeth ground by the answer given, and eventually becomes less rebellious, he becomes a wonderful example to the one who does not know how to ask.

My wife and I are blessed with four children. It is remarkable that each Pesach we are able to gauge where they are developmentally when we discuss Yetziat Mitzrayim, The Exodus from Egypt. It amazes us when one listens and nods, another argues but accepts, another argues and refuses to listen or be bothered and one might not even be engaged but is just too hungry to be bothered. We understand that our words matter. But our deeds matter more.  In celebrating freedom we understand that ultimately we are responsible for our deeds. So when we answer our children’s questions, not only our words matter; and not only our tone matters. Our answers must be consistent with our deeds, and if they are not we have to be able to explain and teach our children.

Peace,

Rav Yitz