Friends of ours celebrated their son’s Bar Mitzvah. We ate, drank, and were subjected to incredibly loud music designed for young people. It always amazes me as a parent, that once you achieve the milestone of your youngest child’s Bar or Bat Mitzvah, the music at every other Bar/Bat Mitzvah seems so much louder. Yes, I suppose it is an indication of old age. We also sat through several speeches. The Bar Mitzvah boy gave offered interesting words of Torah. The siblings spoke. However, it was listening to both the father and the mother speak that began to understand and thinking about our children’s rights of passage and milestones: Bar/Bat Mitzvahs, Weddings, and Bris or graduations. The father spoke and referenced his mother who had passed away several years before. The mother invoked her father who had been unable to attend her older son’s Bar Mitzvah because he, the grandfather of the Bar Mitzvah boy, was in Israel mourning and sitting Shiva for his mother. Through her joy and pride in her son, through her tears and gratitude that her father was able to attend this family event; she demonstrated what every parent understands. At any achievement of a milestone, at every lifecycle event, the parents, we parents understand that the purer the joy, the greater the sense of a desire to invoke and share that moment with a loved one who is unable to be there and, in effect, temper that joy.
This week’s Torah portion is Parsha Tazria. Parsha Tazria concentrates upon how impurity, a spiritual impurity is passed between people. The majority of the Parsha focuses upon Leprosy as it was considered to be a very physically contagious disease. Parsha Tazria puts the diagnosis, the treatment, and the convalescence in spiritual terms rather than physical terms. We learn that the while this Tumah, this spiritual impurity is present, the stricken individual cannot reside within the camp. After all, God dwells in the camp and we cannot tolerate any impurity near God.
However, prior to its discussion of Leprosy, Parsha Tazria outlines the somewhat troubling laws concerning impurity in childbirth. Fundamentally, the notion of impurity relates to coming into contact with that which is dead. In Parsha Shemini, Torah outlined impurities that come from dead animals. In this Parsha, we are reminded that a Mother is touched by death during the miracle of childbirth. Isha Ki Tazria V’Yalda Zachar V’Tamah Shivat Yamim Kimei Nitdat Dotah Titmah – When a woman conceives and gives birth to a male, she shall be contaminated for a seven day period as during the days of her separation infirmity shall she be contaminated (Lev. 12:2). Imagine becoming spiritually impure after being blessed by the miracle of childbirth. Yet, this new mother lost blood; she lost some aspect of her life force during the birth process. As a result, while simultaneously being touched by a new life, she is also touched by her own mortality.
Perhaps there is no more an intense moment than when a new mother, physically exhausted and spent, holds the newborn. The Rabbis of the Talmud teach that surviving childbirth is an equivalent to a near-death experience and saying Birkat HaGomeil is therefore required. (Praised are You, Lord Our God, King of the universe who graciously bestows favor upon the undeserving, even as He has bestowed favor upon me.) Inherent to surviving a near-death experience is the notion that the individual comes precipitously close to death. Even in the miracle of life, we are reminded of its fragility. Even in death, we are reminded that we are forever striving towards elevated levels of holiness. In the most physical moments, and certainly, childbirth is quite a physical endeavor, we are reminded that it is our spiritual task to elevate that physical moment into a spiritually holy moment as well. As parents celebrating our children’s milestones, we are innately aware of the need to acknowledge our sense of loss and elevate it by incorporating it into our celebration.
Peace
Rav Yitz
No comments:
Post a Comment