I Have Spent My Life Seeking All That's Still Unsung (Robert Hunter & Jerry Garcia- "Attics Of My Life)

           Well, the unofficial end of summer is upon us. It is Labour Day Weekend. Indeed, summer came and went, our children headed off to where they are supposed to be, and I quietly celebrated a birthday.  Yep, another year has gone by. My beard is grayer and while I am thankful for the hair on my head, it is grayer as well. I have never been a big fan of birthdays. I always like to spend them quietly. While some in my family prefer some extraordinary family activity or party, I prefer a round of golf, sitting by a swimming pool, reading a book while my kids swim, and then grilling some steaks and eating dinner outside with my wife and children. Usually during golf, while I am admiring the scenic beauty, while I watch my children playing in the pool, or while I am grilling dinner; I have an opportunity for a bit of self-reflection. This year, I spend my birthday returning home from dropping our daughter off at college in Maryland.  I had lots of time to reflect while my wife slept and I drove through Maryland, Pennsylvania, New York, and eventually Ontario.  I thought about successes and failures, I thought about what my plans were after college, and where I am in terms of those plans. Have I realized any of my goals? Am I on course, or off course? If I am off course, am I so far off course that I cannot get back on course? For thirty-two years I have had a child in my house and my children have been at the forefront of every decision I have made. Have I accomplished anything? On one level, the self-reflection exercise can be pretty brutal. There are times I feel like a complete failure except as a father.  I seriously wonder if I measure up to the standards that I set for myself way back when I had first left home and set out on my life’s journey. There are moments when this birthday self-reflection can be really quite depressing. Once in a while, there is a moment of contentment. I am always amazed by the differences between my idealized pristine life and my not-so-pristine life grounded in reality. 

        This week’s Parsha is Shoftim. Moshe has completed his lecture on the values of monotheism and covenant. Now he begins telling B'nai Yisroel all the nitty gritty details of living a Jewish life within this community. What a downer! B’nai Yisroel is inspired and ready to enter Eretz Canaan and begin living life in the land that God had promised their ancestors. They are now ready to begin fulfilling the dream that allowed them to survive centuries of slavery. So what does Moshe Rabeinu do? He brings them crashing back to reality. Now they will listen and understand laws concerning war, punishments for idolatry, choosing a king, jurisprudence, priestly entitlements, and unsolved murders. Moshe gives B’nai Yisroel a healthy dose of reality by supplying all the details required to uphold the Covenant.

        One of these laws is rather curious yet serves as a reminder of how important it is to maintain a balance between dreams and reality, between the idealism of our youth and the cynicism of age. V’Hayah Ch’shivto Al Kisei Mamlachto V’Chatav Lo Et Mishnei HaTorah Hazot – And it shall be when he sits on the throne of his kingdom, he shall write for himself two copies of this Torah in a book… V’Haitah Imo V’Kara Vo Kol Yemei Chayav Lema’an Yilmad L’yirah et Adonai Elohav – It shall be with him and he shall read from it all the days of his life, so that he will learn to fear the Lord his God, Lishmor et Kol Divrei HaTorah Ha’Zot V’Et HaChukim Ha’Eilah La’Asotam – to observe all the words of this Torah and these decrees, to perform them so that his heart does not become haughty over his brethren and not turn from the commandment right or left so that he will prolong years over his kingdom, he and his sons amid Israel (Deut. 18:18-20). The king must write and maintain two Sifrei Torah. The “personal” Torah must be carried with him wherever he goes: meetings, wars, benefit dinners, etc. The Torah must always remain physically near his heart. However, the second Sefer Torah sits in the treasure room as a pristine copy, as a benchmark. This “benchmark” Torah remains enclosed, protected, and untouched. The king may consult it, but this pristine copy never leaves the sanctuary. How brilliant! The “personal” Torah that is carried around eventually becomes worn, the letters fade, and the parchment may even tear. This would most likely occur unbeknownst to the king. Yearly, the king must lay his “personal” Torah besides the “benchmark” Torah. There, in the inner chamber, the two Torahs are checked against each other. Then if there are any discrepancies in the “Personal” Torah, the king must make the necessary corrections. The king’s “personal” Torah must reflect the purest and highest standard. Through daily wear and tear, through the compromises necessary to manage a kingdom, the king must regularly check to make sure that he has not gradually drifted away from the “Pristine” or “Benchmark” Torah.

        This is the ultimate form of personal “Checks and Balances”! Instead of waking up one morning thirty-two years later with the kids all grown up and moved out of the house wondering “What’s become of me”; Judaism understands that we all make compromises. Sometimes we may even, unfortunately, compromise our integrity our values, and our own sense of propriety. Sometimes our drift from the ideal is not even that pernicious. Sometimes we just slow down or get sidetracked. However, Judaism is about behavior that expresses our relationship with each other and with God. Like a king that needs to periodically check his “personal Torah” against the “Benchmark Torah”, we also must check our “Personal Torah” against the “Benchmark Torah”. Certainly, the process may be uncomfortable, and yes, there is the danger of becoming so self-absorbed that we become so paralyzed that we are unable to move our lives forward. There is a very real danger that we can be hard on ourselves that we lose sight of the good. Thankfully, the process occurs on a regular enough basis that we don’t become so paralyzed that we are unable to enjoy a round of golf, watch the kids swim, enjoy a steak dinner with the family, or appreciate the beautiful scenery while driving from Maryland, through Pennsylvania, New York, and Ontario or even appreciate the quiet blessings of another birthday.

Peace
Rav Yitz

The Shape It Takes Could Be Yours To Choose; What You May Win And What You May Lose (Robert Hunter & Jerry Garcia - "Till The Morning Comes")

          It seems that there we are living in two different worlds. One world appears more “normal” to me. In this world, the Canada/U.S. border is at least partially completely open. Canadians are still waiting for the U.S. to permit them to drive across the border. Fully vaccinated Americans are allowed to drive across the border subject to covid test results prior to crossing the border. In this "more" normal or "almost normal" world, the Toronto Blue Jays are finally home and I can go to the ballpark, and people dutifully get vaccinated.   In this "almost normal world" or "more normal" world, Ontario is now over 70% fully vaccinated and Canada is now over 60% fully vaccinated, masks are worn in public places and will be worn in schools. In this "almost normal" or "more normal" world, decisions seem to be made thoughtfully, cautiously, with the concern for the public good, and welfare to be the most important criteria.  In the other world, the world on the other side of the border, where my parents live, my wife’s family lives, my sister and her family live, where one daughter lives and works and where two daughters are supposed to attend university,  that world seems to be embroiled in an identity crisis. One part of that world, thankfully the places where my wife’s family, my family, and our daughters live, are similar to the "almost normal" or "more normal" world. Many are vaccinated,  and while there were a few weeks where masks were not required in public places; now public masking indoors is necessary because of the strength of the Delta Variant. Owners of restaurants have determined that they will only permit vaccinated people onto their premises. Attending concerts requires proof of vaccination. Public safety and welfare decisions are made thoughtfully and cautiously based on science, data, and current conditions based on a concern for the welfare of the whole of society and special concern for the most vulnerable.  In this second world, the Delta Variant runs wild,  and hospitals are filled with younger and sicker people. If these states were a combined country,  they would be ground zero for this “Fourth Wave” of the Pandemic. Ironically, one Governor wants the state legislature to revoke its current ban on mask-wearing. Other Governors have dug in their heels and have signed controversial executive orders prohibiting school boards from determining for themselves as to whether to mandate masks. These governors, specifically in Florida and Texas (places with the most outbreaks) use the rhetoric of “personal choice” and “freedom”.  In such places, decisions seem to be made based upon “politics”, rumors, non-scientific data, cowardice, selfishness, and a failure to understand the nature of leadership. 

          This week’s Parsha is Shoftim. Moshe has completed his lecture on the values of monotheism and covenant. Now he begins telling B'nai Yisroel all the nitty-gritty details of living a Jewish life within this community. What a downer! B’nai Yisroel is inspired and ready to enter into Eretz Canaan and begin living the life in the land that God had promised their ancestors. They are now ready to begin fulfilling the dream that allowed them to survive centuries of slavery. So what does Moshe Rabeinu do? He brings them crashing back to reality. Now they will listen and understand laws concerning war, punishments for idolatry, choosing a king, jurisprudence, priestly entitlements, and unsolved murders. Moshe gives B’nai Yisroel a healthy dose of reality by supplying all the details required to uphold the Covenant.

        One of these laws is rather curious yet serves as a reminder of how important it is to maintain a balance between dreams and reality, between the idealism of our youth and the cynicism of age. V’Hayah Ch’shivto Al Kisei Mamlachto V’Chatav Lo Et Mishnei HaTorah Hazot – And it shall be when he sits on the throne of his kingdom, he shall write for himself two copies of this Torah in a book… V’Haitah Imo V’Kara Vo Kol Yemei Chayav Lema’an Yilmad L’yirah et Adonai Elohav – It shall be with him and he shall read from it all the days of his life, so that he will learn to fear the Lord his God, Lishmor et Kol Divrei HaTorah Ha’Zot V’Et HaChukim Ha’Eilah La’Asotam – to observe all the words of this Torah and these decrees, to perform them so that his heart does not become haughty over his brethren and not turn from the commandment right or left so that he will prolong years over his kingdom, he and his sons amid Israel (Deut. 18:18-20). The king must write and maintain two Torah scrolls. The “personal” Torah must be carried with him wherever he goes: meetings, wars, benefit dinners, etc. The Torah must always remain physically near his heart. However, the second Sefer Torah sits in the treasure room as a pristine copy, as a benchmark. This “benchmark” Torah remains enclosed, protected, and untouched. The king may consult it, but this pristine copy never leaves the sanctuary. How brilliant! The “personal” Torah that is carried around eventually becomes worn, the letters fade, and the parchment may even tear. This would most likely occur unbeknownst to the king. Yearly, the king must lay his “personal” Torah besides the “benchmark” Torah. There, in the inner chamber, the two Torahs are checked against each other. Then if there are any discrepancies in the “Personal” Torah, the king must make the necessary corrections. The king’s “personal” Torah must reflect the purest and highest standards. Through daily wear and tear, through the compromises necessary to manage a kingdom, the king must regularly check to make sure that he has not gradually drifted away from the “Pristine” or “Benchmark” Torah.

        This is the ultimate form of personal “Checks and Balances”!  The king needs to periodically check his “personal Torah” against the “Benchmark Torah”.  We also must check our “Personal Torah” against the “Benchmark Torah”. Certainly, the process may be uncomfortable, and yes, there is the danger of becoming so self-absorbed that we become paralyzed. The process occurs on a regular enough basis that we don’t become too paralyzed that we can’t function. However, what is so empowering is that this “personal Torah” is not confined to the King.  In this regard, we are all kings, we are all royalty. We are all better off making sure that our “personal Torah”, the one we carry with us wherever we go matches up with Torah, the Torah that we learn from, the Torah that we read upon Shabbat and Holidays.  In watching these two different worlds, I wonder about the types of leaders of these two worlds. I wonder about the people in these “two worlds”.  I wonder about the Torah, the behavioral code that leaders in these “two words” carry with them and remain answerable.  

Peace
Rav Yitz

The Black Throated Wind Keeps On Pouring In With Its Words Of A Life Where Nothing Is New Ah, Mother American Night, I'm Lost From The Light (John Barlow & Bob Weir- "Black Throated Wind")

           Three ongoing activities have dominated our home this past week. During the day, we take one daughter for her physiotherapy as she rehabs her surgically repaired knee.  We help our youngest daughter get packed and prepared for her gap year in Israel. She leaves next week. After dinner, I sit down and turn on the Democratic National Convention and text with my eldest daughter, a Democratic campaign manager. As I listened to some of the “big names” speak, three of whom my daughter has worked for: Hillary Clinton, Senator Warren, and President Obama, I was struck by a theme that each alluded to and President Obama so eloquently and explicitly pointed out. Speaking from Philadelphia, from the site where the U.S. Constitution was signed, the former president reminded us that the President’s job is to defend the constitution. In order to do that, the President must appreciate the sanctity of the Constitution’s words. the President must understand the meaning of those words. The President must acknowledge that those words are applicable to every American citizen no matter color, gender, religion, voting preference, or ethnic background.  President Obama reminded viewers that the oath of the President is serious, the office weighs heavy and should not be taken lightly nor cavalierly. From President Obama’s perspective, it appeared that the words of the Constitution must be held close to the President’s heart in order for him/her to have the character to fulfill its words.

          This week’s Parsha is Shoftim. Moshe has completed his lecture on the values of monotheism and covenant. Now he begins telling B'nai Yisroel all the nitty-gritty details of living a Jewish life within this community. What a downer! B’nai Yisroel is inspired and ready to enter into Eretz Canaan and begin living the life in the land that God had promised their ancestors. They are now ready to begin fulfilling the dream that allowed them to survive centuries of slavery. So what does Moshe Rabeinu do? He brings them crashing back to reality. Now they will listen and understand laws concerning war, punishments for idolatry, choosing a king, jurisprudence, priestly entitlements, and unsolved murders. Moshe gives B’nai Yisroel a healthy dose of reality by supplying all the details required to uphold the Covenant.

          One of these laws is rather curious yet serves as a reminder of how important it is to maintain a balance between dreams and reality, between the idealism of our youth and the cynicism of age. V’Hayah Ch’shivto Al Kisei Mamlachto V’Chatav Lo Et Mishnei HaTorah Hazot – And it shall be when he sits on the throne of his kingdom, he shall write for himself two copies of this Torah in a book… V’Haitah Imo V’Kara Vo Kol Yemei Chayav Lema’an Yilmad L’yirah et Adonai Elohav – It shall be with him and he shall read from it all the days of his life, so that he will learn to fear the Lord his God, Lishmor et Kol Divrei HaTorah Ha’Zot V’Et HaChukim Ha’Eilah La’Asotam – to observe all the words of this Torah and these decrees, to perform them so that his heart does not become haughty over his brethren and not turn from the commandment right or left so that he will prolong years over his kingdom, he and his sons amid Israel (Deut. 18:18-20). The king must write and maintain two Sifrei Torah. The “personal” Torah must be carried with him wherever he goes: meetings, wars, benefit dinners, etc. The Torah must always remain physically near his heart. However, the second Sefer Torah sits in the treasure room as a pristine copy, as a benchmark. This “benchmark” Torah remains enclosed, protected, and untouched. The king may consult it, but this pristine copy never leaves the sanctuary. How brilliant! The “personal” Torah that is carried around eventually becomes worn, the letters fade, and the parchment may even tear. This would most likely occur unbeknownst to the king. Yearly, the king must lay his “personal” Torah besides the “benchmark” Torah. There, in the inner chamber, the two Torahs are checked against each other. Then if there are any discrepancies in the “Personal” Torah, the king must make the necessary corrections. The king’s “personal” Torah must reflect the purest and highest standard. Through daily wear and tear, through the compromises necessary to manage a kingdom, the king must regularly check to make sure that he has not gradually drifted away from the “Pristine” or “Benchmark” Torah.

          This is the ultimate form of personal “Checks and Balances”. Instead of living a life based upon “how much can I get away with”, “What am I entitled to”, “how can I enrich myself”, Judaism reminds the leader that there is a code by which life must be lived.  Judaism understands that we all make compromises. Sometimes we may even, unfortunately, compromise our integrity our values, and our own sense of propriety. Sometimes our drift from the ideal is not even that pernicious. Sometimes we just slowdown or get sidetracked. However, Judaism is about behavior that expresses our relationship with each other and with God. Like a king that needs to periodically check the “personal Torah” against the “Benchmark Torah”, we also must check our “Personal Torah” against the “Benchmark Torah”. Certainly, the process may be uncomfortable, and yes, there is the danger of becoming so self-absorbed that we become paralyzed. The process occurs on a regular enough basis that we don’t become too paralyzed that we can’t function. However, what is so empowering is that this “personal Torah” is not confined to the King. In this regard, we are all kings, we are all royalty. We are all better off making sure that our “personal Torah”, the one we carry with us wherever we go matches up with Torah, the Torah that we learn from, the Torah that we read upon Shabbat and Holidays. As we have just started the month of Elul, this notion of self-reflection is even more important. Yet as former President Obama explained, a successful President keeps the Constitution’s words close and every decision must be based upon defending and living by those words. It requires self-reflection, honesty, integrity, and moral character. Funny, these are the same qualities that we try to instill in our children.

Peace

Rav Yitz

All The Years Combine, They Melt Into A Dream, A Broken Angel Sings (Robert Hunter & Jerry Garcia - "Stella Blue")

Well Labour Day came and went and with it so did my birthday. Yep another year gone. More gray hair added. I have never been a big fan of birthdays. I always like to spend them quietly. While some in my family prefer some extraordinary family activity or party, I prefer a round of golf, sitting by a swimming pool reading a book while my kids swim and then grilling some steaks and eating dinner outside with my wife and children. Usually during golf while I am admiring the scenic beauty, or while I watch my children playing in the pool, or while I am grilling dinner; I have an opportunity for a bit of self-reflection. I think about successes and failures, I think about what my plans were after college and where I am in terms of those plans. Have I realized any of my goals? Am I on course, off course? With the right trajectory? Thirty years later, have I accomplished anything? On one level, the self- reflection exercise can be pretty brutal. There are times I feel like a complete failure save for my family.  There when I seriously wonder if I measure up to the standards that I set for myself way back when. For a moment this self- reflection on my Birthday can be really quite depressing. Sometimes there is a moment of contentment. Not only is this normal, but it is very healthy to examine the ideal of a person’s life, with the reality of that life.

            This week’s Parsha is Shoftim. Moshe has completed his lecture on the values of monotheism and covenant. Now he begins telling B'nai Yisroel all the nitty gritty details of living a Jewish life within this community. What a downer! B’nai Yisroel is inspired and ready to enter into Eretz Canaan and begin living the life in the land that God had promised their ancestors. They are now ready to begin fulfilling the dream that allowed them to survive centuries of slavery. So what does Moshe Rabeinu do? He brings them crashing back to reality. Now they will listen and understand laws concerning war, punishments for idolatry, choosing a king, jurisprudence, priestly entitlements and unsolved murders. Moshe gives B’nai Yisroel a healthy dose of reality by supplying all the details required to uphold the Covenant.

            One of these laws is rather curious yet serves as a reminder how important it is to maintain a balance between dreams and reality, between the idealism of our youth and the cynicism of age. V’Hayah Ch’shivto Al Kisei Mamlachto V’Chatav Lo Et Mishnei HaTorah Hazot – And it shall be when he sits on the throne of his kingdom, he shall write for himself two copies of this Torah in a book… V’Haitah Imo V’Kara Vo Kol Yemei Chayav Lema’an Yilmad L’yirah et Adonai Elohav – It shall be with him and he shall read from it all the days of his life, so that he will learn to fear the Lord his God, Lishmor et Kol Divrei HaTorah Ha’Zot V’Et HaChukim Ha’Eilah La’Asotam – to observe all the words of this Torah and these decrees, to perform them, so that his heart does not become haughty over his brethren and not turn from the commandment right or left, so that he will prolong years over his kingdom, he and his sons amid Israel (Deut. 18:18-20). The king must write and maintain two Sifrei Torah. The “personal” Torah must be carried with him wherever he goes: meetings, wars, benefit dinners etc. The Torah must always remain physically near his heart. However the second Sefer Torah sits in the treasure room as a pristine copy, as a benchmark. This “benchmark” Torah remains enclosed, protected, and untouched. The king may consult it, but this pristine copy never leaves the sanctuary. How brilliant! The “personal” Torah that is carried around eventually becomes worn, the letters fade, and the parchment may even tear. This would most likely occur unbeknownst to the king. Yearly, the king must lay his “personal” Torah beside the “benchmark” Torah. There, in the inner chamber, the two Torahs are checked against each other. Then if there are any discrepancies in the “Personal” Torah, the king must make the necessary corrections. The king’s “personal” Torah must reflect the purest and highest standard. Through daily wear and tear, through the compromises necessary to manage a kingdom, the king must regularly check to make sure that he has not gradually drifted away from the “Pristine” or “Benchmark” Torah.

            This is the ultimate form of personal “Checks and Balances”! Instead of waking up one morning twenty or twenty five years later wondering “What’s become of me”; Judaism understands that we all make compromises. Sometimes we may even, unfortunately, compromise our integrity our values and our own sense of propriety. Sometimes our drift from the ideal is not even that pernicious. Sometimes we just slowdown or get sidetracked. However Judaism is about behavior that expresses our relationship with each other and with God. Like a king that needs to periodically check his “personal Torah” against the “Benchmark Torah”, we also must check our “Personal Torah” against the “Benchmark Torah”. Certainly the process may be uncomfortable, and yes, there is the danger of becoming so self-absorbed that we become paralyzed from action. There is the very real danger that we can be hard on ourselves that we lose sight of the good. Thankfully, the process occurs on a regular enough basis that we don’t become too  paralyzed that we can’t enjoy a round of golf, watching the kids swim, eating a steak dinner with the family and appreciating the quiet blessings of another birthday.

Peace

Rav Yitz