Lord, Try To Read Between The Lines; I Had A Feeling I Was Falling, Falling, Falling Lord, I turned Round To See (Robert Hunter & Jerry Garcia -"Bertha")

           It has been quite an emotional week. This week is my grandfather’s 6th yahrzeit. Six years later, there is rarely a day that I don’t think about him. Three years ago, this week was our son’s bar mitzvah which we celebrated in Israel. Also, three years ago, on the day our son read Torah at the Kotel, Nazis marched in Charlottesville, Virginia. This week, my Rebbe passed away after a long illness. Unable to travel to the States, I had to watch as the service was streamed. Our family attended a Zoom memorial service for a great uncle, my late grandfather’s brother in law (his children and I were very close). We also celebrated with our friends who celebrated their son’s wedding in Israel. We also celebrated our son’s 16th birthday this week. Amid the emotional whipsaw of these moments of joy and sorrow, I have cherished quiet moments of watching the ball game with my son, or a movie with my daughters.

          This week's Parsha is Re'eh. Moshe continues his discourse. He has already explained the Mitzvot, and he continues to do that. Moshe has alluded to the blessings of life if B'nai Yisroel follows God's commandments. He has and continues to allude to the curses that will befall B'nai Yisroel if they violate the most important commandment-idolatry. "See I present before you today a blessing and a curse" (Deut.11:26). V'haklalah Im Lo Tishm'u el Mitzvot Adonai Eloheichem V'sartem Min Ha'Derech Asher Anochi M'taveh Etchem Ha'yom La'lechet Acharei Elohim Acheirim Asher Lo Y'Datem-"And the curse: if you do not hearken to the commandments of the Lord your God, and you stray from the path that I command you today, to follow gods of others, that you did know." (Deut. 11:28) Moshe presents B'nai Yisroel with two pictures, a world when B'nai Yisroel lives up to it covenant with God and one in which they don't.  He reminds B'nai Yisroel of the sanctity of Eretz Yisroel (the Land of Israel), the consumption of foods that are consecrated to the Kohanim and he warns B'nai Yisroel to avoid imitating the Rituals and Rites of the Egyptians and the Canaanites. Moshe reminds B'nai Yisroel to be careful of false prophets, avoiding non-kosher foods, not living in wayward cities, forgiving loans after seven years, caring for the less fortunate, and celebrating the three pilgrimage festivals of Pesach, Shavuot, and Sukkot.

          The Torah tells us: Ki Im El HaMakom Asher Yivchar Adoshem Eloheichem miKol Shivteichem LaSum et Shmo Sham L’Shichno Tidreshu Uvata SHama – Rather, only at the place that Hashem, your God, will choose from among all your tribes to place His Name shall you seek out his Presence, his dwelling, and come there. Certainly, this is reminiscent of the Kadosh Baruch Hu, at the time of the Akeida, telling Avraham that he will show him where to go with his son Yitzchak. Its reminiscent of Avraham as much younger man, leaving his home and going to a place that God would show him., Certainly we could understand Moshe’s words as a  reminder for B’nai Yisroel that “sanctity”. Holiness, Kedusha is central to  Israel, Torah, and Jewish identity. The Sfas Emet (The Gerrer Rebbe from about 1870-1905) reminds us that HaShem’s choice is not revealed until B’nai Yisroel “seeks”.  We only find answers when we seek, when we look, when we investigate. Because we are commanded to seek Shechino, his divine aspects that dwell among us, we are tasked to seek holiness. Holiness is in Time and Space. Holiness is in our  Neshama, Holiness is in our choices, and in our words, our deeds and the way we live our lives. That is the constant choice we are commanded to make HaYom Today –  a choice that we make each and every day and each and every moment.  

          Indeed, the week has been full of all kinds of emotional swings. Yet it dawned on me that precisely during those moments of joy, sorrow, anguish, and gratitude; “seeking” God is most possible. When we are spiritually sedentary, when we are spiritually lazy, we probably lack the spiritual insight of “sight”  of being able to sense or see God. Yet, when we experience the full range of human experience and emotion, we begin to ask questions. Some ask “why”, although I rarely suggest we ask that question. Rather we ought to ask “How”. How do I make this moment, this moment of anguish, or joy, meaningful? How do I make this moment of sorrow or joy holy? When we ask those questions, and we adapt rituals that express meaning in those moments, we embody the words of the Sfat Emet and seek God. In doing so, we make the week full of anguish, and joy, meaningful and sacred.

Peace,

Rav Yitz

With Its Words Of A Life That Could Almost Be True (John Barlow & Bob Weir - "Black Throated Wind")

Our nineteen-year-old daughter was confronted with a conflict while working as a camp counselor. Camp is scheduled to end two days before she needs to be at her university dormitory in New York City. She needed a week at home in Toronto before heading down to University. So she arranged with the camp to that she would leave four or five days prior to the official conclusion of camp. She and the camp agreed and signed a contract.  When I went to visit her, my wife and our two other children last week, she and I spoke about her early departure. She explained that she felt conflicted because originally she wanted to leave a week before the official conclusion of camp and the camp ‘s original position was that leaving early was unnecessary. Both sides compromised on four days.  As we spoke and she shared with me her frustration, I suggested that she speak to her boss, request an earlier departure date and simultaneously offer to forego being paid the last week. I thought my suggestion was completely reasonable. She gave me a look of shock and incredulity. Then she stated, “I have a contract, I gave my word”.

This Shabbat, we read from the final two Parshiot in Sefer Bemidbar (Book of Numbers): Matot and Masei.  This double Parsha begins with the laws of Nedarim (Vows), and then Bnai Yisroel fights against the Midianites. Moshe rebukes his officers for their collective failure to deal with the Midianite woman since they were the cause of Bnai Yisroel’s plague in the first place. Bnai Yisroel then begins the process of dividing the spoils of this battle. Two tribes, Reuben and Gad request to settle in the land east of the Jordan River and not the land promised by Hashem. Moshe expresses his anger over the request and the two tribes amend their request. Moshe adds a condition and an agreement is reached. The Torah recounts the various stops that Bnai Yisroel made on their journey to Eretz Canaan, the boundaries of Eretz Canaan are clarified, the new leadership is introduced and the cities of refuge of explained and established. Finally, Sefer Bemidbar concludes with a reminder of the laws for tribal inheritance. With all those loose ends neatly sewn up; Bnai Yisroel now sits on the eastern bank of the Jordan River waiting to enter Eretz Canaan. As we conclude the reading, we say Chazak Chazak v’ NitChazeik – From strength to strength we shall go forward in strength.

The beginning of the Parsha, with its focus upon Nedarim v’Shvuot Vows and Oaths, we are being reminded of two vital concepts. First, we are reminded of the Aseret Dibrot, of the Ten Commandments and specifically invoking God’s name in vain.  Ish Ki Yidor Neder L’adoshem When a man takes a vow to Hashem (Num. 30:3). Part of the process by which one makes a vow is to invoke God name. Therefore, a failure to keep the vow or the oath means that one has used God’s name in vain. The repercussions of which are extremely serious.  Second, we learned in Sefer Breishit (Book of Genesis) that speech is holy. Speech is part of the God’s creative process; Vayomer Elokim, Yehi Or, VaYahi Or- And God said: Let there be Light, and there was light. In a sense, speech is perhaps one of the only actions available to us that allow us to emulate God. When we make a vow or an oath, we are acting similar to God. A Neder is a pledge to prohibit oneself from something that that the Torah permits. Or a Neder can be obligating oneself to something that the Torah considers to be optional. Obligating one’s self to contribute to a specific charity would be an example of "obligating that which is optional". Refraining from apples would be an example of prohibiting something that is originally acceptable. In either case, the individual is truly acting like God. The individual is creating Halacha and making his vow and or oath becomes tantamount to Torah. Clearly, this cannot be taken lightly. After all, the severity of the language is a function of the fact that one makes this vow, pledge or oath to God and not to oneself or to another.  Fundamental to our vows with God is a trust in the relationship, trust that it exists, trust that it is desired by both and trust that is must be treated as sacred.

Indeed, my daughter made gave her word regarding her early departure from camp. Yes, she complained. Yes, she shared her anxiety as she wondered how everything would get done before her leaving for university. Yes, she was certainly shocked when I suggested that she calmly and reasonably offer to give up a week of pay in order to leave earlier than the time that had been agreed upon. All that time, as I listened to her, and made suggestions, I thought I was listening to my little girl. After she incredulously told me that she gave me her word and signed a contract’ my little girl reminded me that her mother and I spent the last nineteen years raising her to be a woman that kept her word.  I guess she is our little girl isn’t so little anymore. Indeed, she is a woman of her word.  

Peace,

Rav Yitz  

And Forget About The Darkness You Have Seen (Jerry Garcia, Dave Parker & The Grateful Dead- "The Only Time Is Now")

Immediately after the Pesach Festival and Shabbat concluded and after we completed the Havdalah service, my wife saw that there were several WhatsApp messages from our daughter Hannah. Hannah has been studying in Israel during this current school year. She told us that there had been a synagogue shooting at a Shul in Poway, California, a suburb of San Diego. Having lived in San Diego for two years, she was worried.  She was worried for a number of reasons. Did any of us know any of the victims or their families?  Was it the one shul or were other San Diego synagogues targeted?  Then of course there were the larger questions of a genuine concern about a rising tide of anti-Semitic incidents and near incidents throughout the U.S. Two days after the tragedy, my wife and I watched the funeral for the woman who was murdered during that Poway Synagogue terrorist attack. At the cemetery, there was another Hannah, the daughter of the deceased, who knelt by the grave as people performed a final act of kindness and placed dirt upon the casket. Hannah remained knelt as the hole was filled. Hannah remained knelt when they place a marker and she remained knelt and weeping for her mother as they pleaded with her to stand up. Eventually, Hannah was helped to her feet, she returned home and has been sitting Shiva. I spoke to my Hannah, and she explained that she hadn’t slept well as she  feels increased anxiety and concern for the myriad of friends that she has throughout Canada and the United States. As she explained to me, “It seems that we are all targets because we are Jewish”. I wished I could have  disagreed; I couldn’t. Yes, to a degree, we Jews are targets. It seems that we always have been and sadly it appears that we always will be targets, but that doesn’t mean we need to perceive ourselves as victims.  I have thought about my Hannah in Israel who is scheduled to return home and begin University in the fall. I have thought about another Hannah who is only a few years older, a victim of Anti-Semitism, who just buried her mother and will spend this Shabbat in the midst of Shiva. I have thouight about the Jewish people who had just observed Yom Hashoah, Holocaust Remembrance Day.  

Dear Hannah:

Hashem Yikom Damah. I cannot imagine that there are any words that could bring you consolation during this tragic moment in life. Perhaps someday these words may prove to be a source of consolation after the intensity of shiva has concluded, and shloshim has waned, and you, your father, and extended family are left with the task of living. Yes, you will be living a very different type of life than the one that you were familiar with while you sat at your family’s seder celebrating Pesach. What I am saying to you Hannah, are words that I would say to my Hannah. There will be a someday when I won’t be able to say these words to her but they are words that she will need to hear as well. They are words that embody the way we raised our Hannah, and they are words that I know embody the way your mother raised her Hannah, you. While you may not be ready to read these words, I hope they might provide you with a source of strength when you feel darkness and emptiness encroaching upon your soul.  I hope these words will offer you a source of light for your eyes when the darkness of others souls encroach upon you. I hope these words will offer warmth and security when darkness, hatred, and vitriol abound. These words of light are inspired by this week’s Torah portion: Acharei Mot. The Torah portion that resumes Aharon’s HaKohen’s preparations for his role in society immediately following the tragic deaths of his two sons.

The Torah portion discusses the Yom Kippur Avodah Service and the Kohen Gadol’s Vidui (The High Priest’s confession). Instructions are given regarding the drawing of lots and sending one goat into the wilderness and making an offering of the other goat on behalf of the community. The Parsha concludes with a reminder about the prohibition of consuming blood and then a list of forbidden relationships.  Throughout the Parsha, Hashem speaks to Moshe who is supposed to speak to his brother Aaron regarding the Yom Kippur laws. This makes sense since Aaron is the Kohen Gadol and must know every detail concerning the offerings, blood sprinkling and bringing about atonement on his behalf as well as the B’nai Yisroel’s behalf. However, I have always wondered why Acharei Mot continues with a list of human relationships forbidden to B'nai Yisroel. The second half seems to belong to next week’s Torah portion. How is the first half of Acharei Mot connected to the second half Acharei Mot? How are Moshe’s instruction for his brother Aaron connected to his instructions for the rest of B’nai Yisroel?
 I have struggled to find the words of consolation and light for you, Hannah, and for my Hannah. I watched your mother’s funeral and listened to Rabbi Goldstein. I know the community and I know people who knew your mother. I had a moment of clarity and an answer to my question. Indeed, the answer has everything to do with how your mother lived her life, and how my wife and I have raised our Hannah as well as her siblings. Acharei Mot, after death, after the death of a loved one, when we are bereft, inconsolable, feeling empty and perhaps very much alone, when we are left feeling as if there is “no point” to any of this; while our soul and our faith is in turmoil; we are left with Mourner’s Kaddish. We are left with life and all the mundane attributes of living that life. Aaron HaKohen had to continue living life, which is not to say he didn’t mourn every day of his life for his two sons. I am sure he mourned every day. However, he got on with the job of living life. The question is what is the job of living life? Your mother answered that question in the way she lived her life. Rabbi Goldstein answered thata question in his recent letter to the editor. This week was Yom HaShoah, and every Jew who died for Kiddush HaShem, and every kind and decent person who has ever lived, provided an answer to those of us who must continue living and to those of us who try to bring light to the darkest places. It is the answer  as to why the second part of Acharei Mot and its list of forbidden relationships appears in this weeks Parsha and continues into next week’s Torah Portion, Kedoshim. The job of living life is to live it with Kedushah, Holiness. No matter how mundane, no matter how we may feel, if we are indeed, created in God’s image, then we have the capacity to always strive for and achieve a level of holiness that is beyond “human nature”.  The capacity to strive for and achieve holiness is evident in our personal relationships, our relationship to God, our relationship to strangers and our relationship with our communities. Your mother embodied Chesed, kindness, and decency; she was a light of holiness for the community in which she lived and the lives she touched.  As a parent, I hope that my Hannah has been imbued with the propensity to live a life of Kedushah and Chesed, a life of holiness and kindness as your mother and father have taught you.  Because Acharei Mot, after death, those who remain alive have an opportunity to live lives with greater holiness and kindness and in doing so, reflext their loved one’s light  and shine it upon the darkness.

Peace,

Rav Yitz

Take Me To The Reaper Man, To Pay Back What Was Loaned ( Robert Hunter & Jerry Garcia - "Mason's Children"

     This past Monday, Toronto experienced something that cities like New York, Boston, Paris, London, Jerusalem have all experienced. Toronto experienced a random act of violence that was designed to call to attention the perpetrator’s anger, disillusionment, and alienation. The recent tragic event that occurred on Yonge Street in North York might not considered to be an act of terrorism, that is to say, the politically/religiously motivated terrorism that we have all seen occur in other locales; driving down a side walk in a van and purposefully hitting pedestrians in a wanton act of random violence because the driver was angry, alienated, disillusioned and misguided still caused terror in the all those in the area at that time. His senseless act of violence caused terror in an entire city until he was apprehended.  Like all the other cities that have experienced wanton mass murder, whether by gun, bomb or car; I am always intrigued by how cities and its citizens respond. As a family, we went to the spontaneous memorials that have popped up along Yonge Street between Finch and Sheppard. As a family we have noticed something different after the deaths of these Ten innocent people who were walking along Yonge Street on a beautiful spring day.

      This Shabbat, we read the double portion of Acharei Mot/Kedoshim. The Torah resumes its narrative following the death of Aaron’s two eldest son’s in Shemini (two Shabbatot ago). The narrative appeared interrupted with a presentation of the laws of purity and impurity found in Tazria/Metzorah. The Parsha begins with Moshe telling Aaron about the procedure the Kohen must undergo in preparation for atonement: both personal and communal. Essentially, this is the section of Torah that discusses the details of the Yom Kippur service, the scapegoat offering, the fasting, and sprinkling of blood. The Torah reminds us of the sanctity of blood; blood is life and as a result, we are prohibited from eating the blood of an animal. Following the presentation of of the Yom Kippur offerings and the sanctity of blood, the Torah spends the rest of Acharei Mot reminding us of those relationships that are considered to be sacred and those that are considered to be categorically unholy. Kedoshim which literally means “Holy”, continues the theme that Acharei Mot introduced. There are sacred/holy relationships and unholy relationships. In every instance when the holy and the unholy presents itself, Moshe tells us to choose the holy relationship. Every seemingly mundane activity including: the treatment of employees, the treatment of customers, idolatry, every human relationship is distilled to the most common element. Every mundane act, every mundane human interaction has the potential for achieving a degree of Holiness.

     No commandment within the Torah indicates the tension between base primitive emotions (human instinct) and holiness (Godly instinct) more than the idea of revenge. Lo TiKom V’Lo TiTor et Bnai Amecha – You shall not take revenge and you shall not bear a grudge against member of your people (Lev. 19:18). V’Ahavta L’Rei’acha K’Mocha Ani Adoshem – you shall love your fellow as yourself – I am Hashem (Lev. 19:18). Revenge is a primary instinct. Someone hurts us or our loved ones, we want to return the hurt. Someone insults us, we want to return the insult. A young man who has been described as socially awkward, who was disillusioned and alienated decides to rent a van and drive it on a sidewalk for the sole purpose of killing as many people as possible. Our children were amazed that the policeman didn’t shoot the man even though he repeatedly made threatening motions with what turned out to be a cell phone. Our son sacastically commented that if we were back in the States, the police officer would have shot him, especially if he was a man of color.  No doubt some would have hailed that policeman as a hero. Even after his arrest and arraignment, we can all appreciate any family member or friend of the ten who were murdered and the fifteen who were injured wanting this murderer to suffer, and eventually die. I have no doubt that in the moment the murderer told the cop to shoot, there were those who felt the policemen should have obliged him, and killed the man on the spot. Revenge probably would have left us with a sense of closure, ‘that he got what he deserved”. Yet the Torah tells us that we are supposed to figure out a means by which we rise above our basest human emotions (even if those emotions are justifiable). The point is that emotions are human.  What makes us holy is our actions and behavior. Acting on our emotions without thought, without concern, with out some type of check or balance makes us comparable to animals. We are supposed to strive to be be better than the animals. Better than the four legged variety or the two legged variety who doesn’t know how to channel or deal with his emotions.

     Our son pointed out the difficulty of Judaism. Judaism recognizes basic human emotions. However, to be Holy to be Kodesh, to be separate and distinct means to separating emotions from deed and action.  Yes, it is easy to separate one day of the week from six days. Yes, for some it is easy to separate milk and meat.  No one would disagree that treating those who are most needy in our community with dignity and respect demonstrates a degree of holiness and decency for that matter. Yet such a person has not caused harm or brought terror to us. So how do we elevated ourselves when dealing with terror, anger, fear, and death? Our children felt something when we went to the memorials. They found a sense of comfort. While nothing brings back the deceased, we found solace on Yonge Street. We discovered that a community and a society has within it, the ability to strive towards holiness Acherei Mot – after death.

Peace,

Rav Yitz

Paradise Waits, On The Crest Of A Wave Her Angels In Flame (Robert Hunter & Jerry Garcia- "Help On The Way")

There is no question that the highlight of our family's week is Shabbat. The house is cleaned; the kitchen smells of my wife's delicious cooking. With teenage children in the house, there is an expectation that they contribute to the Shabbat preparations. They are expected to have their rooms picked up, shower, set the table, and help in any of the last minute cooking or baking preparations and the ensuing clean up. Inevitably, one of them is on the phone, or the computer slacking off. After a gentle reminder or three, and sometimes a less gentle reminder, the preparations resume with everyone contributing. When we finally sit down to our meal, we all take a deep breath as we are ever mindful of the physical preparation that was required in order to appreciate such a spiritually powerful moment. So as we sing “Shalom Aleichem”, bless our children, and chant Eishet Chayil, and I see the Shabbat Candles burning; our home has achieved a level of spirituality that is very different from the weekday. Shabbat is very unique day in which the physical and the spiritual combine in a perfect symmetry and create the opportunity for a truly wonderful day. Ever mindful of our physical existence, Shabbat is the day where our physical existence is infused with spirituality. Shabbat is the day where we bring Olam Habah, and Gan Eden down to us and our physical existence.

This Shabbat, Jews throughout the world will be celebrating Yom Kippur –The Day of Atonement. The name of the day does sound rather solemn. For most Jews, Yom Kippur is considered a rather somber sort of day and a day in which we are supposed to “afflict” ourselves. In Masechet Yoma (the Talmudic tractate that focus on Yom Kippur), five afflictions are mentioned as part of Yom Kippur. These five afflictions are: fasting (no food or drink from sunset to sunset); washing; anointing; wearing of leather, and marital relations. While Shabbat is the day we do not afflict ourselves, when Yom Kippur falls on Shabbat, Yom Kippur supersedes the laws of Shabbat. Only Yom Kippur supersedes Shabbat in terms of importance. It is known as Shabbat Shabbaton – the Sabbath of all Sabbaths.  How can a day in which we physical afflict ourselves supersede the one day of the week where we miraculously bring the spiritual world down to our physical world?

The Midrash explains that Yom Kippur is the day that Moshe re-ascended the mountain and received the second set of the Aseret Dibrot, (the second set of commandments). Remember, the first set was destroyed when Moshe saw Bnai Yisroel worshipping the Eigel Zahav, the Golden Calf. In his anger, Moshe smashed the first set of stone tablets.  During this second revelation, this more private sort of revelation, Moshe had begged God to be permitted to see God’s face. While God rejected Moshe’s request, God did in fact allow Moshe to see God’s back as God passed (Exodus Chapter 33).  During these 40 days and nights, (beginning on Elul 1 and concluding on Yom Kippur), Moshe fasted.  On the one hand, he experienced a physical affliction due to the lack of food. On the other hand, he had the opportunity to be as near God as was humanly possible. In that moment he had become more spiritual than physical.  Yes we afflict ourselves. However, the “afflictions” are base on the desire to be more spiritual than physical. The “afflictions” are based upon our desire to be as close to God as humanly possible. Our “afflictions” are based upon our desire to experience God from the exalted position of the Angels without care or concern to our physical existence. The Atonement therefore is not the sole purpose of the day. The ultimate purpose of the day is to be as close to God as possible. How can we be close to God if we are ensconced in the physical realm? How can we be close to God if we need to atone for our spiritual shortcomings (our Chetaim –sins)? Our spiritual shortcomings are just that, short of God. Atonement allows us to be closer. Closer to God is a good thing. Closeness to God is the main objective of Yom Kippur. When we achieve this, we should be totally happy, at ease in utterly in awed just like Moshe was when he descended the mountain the second time with the second set of tablet.  God’s spiritual light emanated from Moshe. Who wouldn’t be happy if that happened to each and every one of us?

                 Rather than thinking of Yom Kippur as so somber and serious, it is the one day of the year where we purposefully supersede Shabbat. Rather than bringing HaKadosh Baruch Hu down to us, Yom Kippur is the day that we elevate our souls towards the Kadosh Baruch Hu. The experience should be much more “awe” as in “awesome” instead of somber. That experience ought to fill us with awe, joy, and leave us radiating light.

Gmar Chatima Tov -May we all be sealed in the Book of Life.

Peace,

Rav Yitz